


The Love Affair

by ChidiChidiBumBum



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Affairs, Again, Break Up, Cheating, F/M, Falling In Love, Fluff, Friendship, Humor, Like, Love, Therapy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-24
Updated: 2019-01-24
Packaged: 2019-10-05 18:27:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 7
Words: 34,585
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17330177
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChidiChidiBumBum/pseuds/ChidiChidiBumBum
Summary: Rey finds that she can’t get over her ex boyfriend after they keep ‘encountering’ one another.





	1. The Encounter

Rey felt a warm ray hit her face, she opened her eyes to be blinded by the sun glistening through the curtains. From the looks of it, it was a nice sunny day. Perfect weather to describe how she was feeling at the moment, bright. Her head pounded; hangover. Looking around there was something that didn’t seem familiar, those weren’t her curtains and this wasn’t her bed. It smelled of the sweet pheromones of someone she knew. Rey turned over to see someone she wasn’t expecting to see, Finn. He was in a t-shirt and their were clothes all over the floor. Finn is the guy who _isn’t_ her boyfriend anymore. She was in his house, in his bedroom, with _him_ and - her pants weren’t on. She had remembered the night before but thought it was all just a dream. A _really_ good dream. Her heart sank realizing what she had done. _Fuck_. She thought. She rolled over falling off the bed hitting her shoulder hard on the ground. She swore loud almost waking him up. The bed shook as Finn shuffled to another sleeping position. She pulled her pants on and buckled it up, she stood up noticing her phone was nowhere to be seen. She patted herself down looking for it swearing once again before covering her mouth. She looked at Finn for any signs of him being slightly awake. It would be pretty shitty if he opened his eyes. Rey imagined it trying to think of what she would say or do in that situation. She was wasting time, she had to find her phone and leave. The living room was a mess, filled with empty bottles of beer. Funny thing is she bought a whole case of beer and finished it before the end of the night. No more drinking for her, at least, for now. The least she can do for him is clean up since - she probably ruined their friendship for life. She threw all the bottles in the recycling and got rid of any trace or sign of her being there. Maybe he'll think it was all a dream. Now it was time to look for her phone, now where was it. Rey tried to remember where she was last night, on the couch, to the floor, then Finn's bedroom. She already checked his bedroom, it wasn't there. She looked under the couch, nothing. She stuck her arm between the couch's cushions feeling around for it. Surprisingly there were no crumbs or anything, Finn really knew how to keep his place clean in every crack. She felt her phone and pulled it out, finally she grabbed her shoes and ran out the house. The walk of shame, shame on her. She got in her car and sighed.

”What the fuck did I do?” She asked herself. Rey looked back at the house remembering last night, it was a good night. It was a _real_ good night. Oh so good. Stop it Rey, you’re in a relationship. In fact, she checked her phone to see three missed calls from her actual boyfriend Ben. She called his number, seeing Finn open his front door looking straight at her. Oh come on, why didn't he think it was all just a dream? Thing's would've been so much better if he thought it was a dream. Maybe it was just too good to not be true. He looked concerned but why wouldn’t he be? He’s a good man who’s just done a bad thing, it was an accident though so it couldn’t have that bad of an effect, right? He called out her name. Quickly, Rey started her car and drove off before he could try anything, her heart pounding regret.

“Hello?” Ben said over the Bluetooth speaker.

”Hey..you called?” 

“Yeah, I didn’t see you last night.”

”Oh,” she laughed nervously. “I - picked up an extra shift at the hospital.”

”Your uniform is here, at my house, remember?”

”Right um..” she scratched her head thinking of an excuse. “Oh yeah! Sorry I was thinking about last week, I was - with a friend. I’m coming to pick up my uniform.”

“No need, I’m at your place now. Where are you?” 

“Well I needed milk, so I’m getting some.” She explained fixing her hair in the rear view mirror. Thank god she didn't wear make up or else it would've been a dead giveaway. She looked a hot mess, they really went _in_ last night. She sighed remembering what she did once again, it’s shocking know that she’s the one who’s done it. Most people would expect Ben to cheat on her knowing his reputation, oh god what if people find out? What if Finn tells Rose because he’s guilty? How would people look at her? With disgust, because it’s a dirty deed that wasn’t done even if it wasn’t on purpose. 

”Okay, I’ll just leave your stuff here since you won’t give me a fucking key.”

Rey sighed. “Ben, we’ve talked about this. I’m just not ready for that change yet.”

”When will you be? We’ve been together for almost two months now.” 

“Ben - I’ve gotta go, we’ll talk later.” She hung up and as soon as she did, Finn called. Rolling her eyes she ignored it not wanting to hear his comments about last night. It was stressful enough knowing what she did. It was a mistake. But, then again, the wise Bob Ross once said “there are only happy mistakes” so it wasn’t all bad. Rey was happy making that mistake - no she wasn’t she was with Ben. Ben Ben Ben. Clearly she wasn’t over Finn. The only reason she broke it off is because things were getting too serious, and she was - scared. She’s never felt that way toward anyone and it frightened her, so she ended it. She instantly regretted it after but there was no going back at that point. Soon he moved on and so did she, now they were just friends. Or something like that.   
She pulled up to her apartment building and walked inside. Her uniform was hanging on her doorknob. She unlocked the door and walked back into her average boring tiny apartment she called home. Looking in her fridge there was nothing inside but loads of condiments and a jar of pickles. _What the hell_. She thought grabbing the jar along with a bottle of ketchup. A combo she wasn’t used to but too desperate to complain about. It wasn’t _that_ bad. After finishing the whole jar and swallowing pickle juice in one gulp, she brushed her teeth for half an hour. Then went to work. It was crowded as usual, with telephones ringing, patients panicking, and babies crying. Just another day at the hospital. She put on her badge and made her way to the cafe to collect the trays of food before going to her department. 

“Hey Rey!” Kaydel greeted sitting at her desk. “You look well.” 

“What do you mean?” She chuckled signing in.

“You’re glowing.” 

“Am I?” She grabbed her cart. Wishing she wasn't glowing at the moment, no matter how good she felt. Stop - she didn't feel good about it at all. She felt frustration.

”Oh yeah,” she nodded. “you and the hubby do something special?”

”No.” Rey shrugged making her way into the patients room. She put a smile on her face to seem genuine. The little boy looked over at her giving her a little smile. She raised his bed and handed him his tray of breakfast after saying good morning. Rey stood up and grabbed her cart. “Stay healthy!” She winked turning the cart towards the door. Looking through the glass window she saw Finn looking around for her. She swore under her breath, it wasn't like she could hide in that room, there were more patients waiting for their food. She walked out into the next room quickly giving the patient their food. While going back into the hall Finn noticed her, Rey has never walked faster. Curses for her telling him where she worked. She's never avoided Finn before, it felt weird.

”Rey!” He called out. She ignored him, continuing to push the cart down the hall at a faster pace.  “Rey.” He grabbed her shoulder and she snapped around.

”What!?” She shouted, sounding more annoyed than intended.

”We need to talk.” 

“Not now, I’m at work.” She argued getting back to her cart.

”Oh we’re discussing this now.” He grabbed her wrist, pulled her into the supply closet and turned on the light.

”What the fuck, I said we’ll talk later!”

“No, Rey, I can’t let this go. Okay this isn’t like some secret birthday party we have planned, this is serious shit.”

She crossed her arms and rolled her eyes. “What do you want me to do? Apologize for getting into your pants? I wasn’t expecting for any of that to happen!”

”Well neither was I!” He sighed rubbing his head. “How did it even happen?” 

“I don’t know.” She sighed. “I _was_ a little intoxicated.” 

“Okay, so you showed up at my house, drunk. Then had sex with me.”

”I said a _little_ intoxicated and you’re not the victim either, _you_ were sober and did nothing to stop it! I’m not a slag!”

”I’m not saying you are! But, we slept together because of you!” He accused.

”Because of me? Ugh, please, you put in just much as I did.”

”I was supposed to be spending my night alone! So yes because of you, _you_ came to my house, _you_ were intoxicated, _you_ slept with me. I don’t even get why, because you’re also the one who broke up with me.” 

She completely erased that last sentence from her mind. “Finn, I have to work, I have no time to argue with you about this right now.” 

“But you have to Rey,” his tone changed from upset to concern. “we can’t forget what we did. For fucks sake we’re both in relationships!” 

“Look I know what we did was wrong. But we just won’t tell anyone, that’s all.”

”That won’t make up for it Rey, it just won’t.”

”Why are you so upset at this?” Her arms dropped to her waist as he seemed to be taking this way too personally.

”Why aren’t you!?” He complained.

”I am, Finn! But there isn’t any point in arguing it’s already been done! We had sex it’s over!” The janitor walked in and looked at them both skeptically while taking supplies. They hushed themselves giving him sweet smiles as they waited for him to leave before continuing their argument. 

She placed her hand on her hip. “Is that what you came here for? To yell at me?”

”No, you left your sweater at my house. Something you always did as an excuse to come back.”

She snatched it from him. “Not this time.” Their was silence as they took a deep breath, letting the angry chemicals fade.

“So what now?” He asked. “What do we do?” 

“We stay friends.” She shrugged. “I mean, we can do that..right?”

”I don’t know Rey,” he opened the door. “I just don’t know.” He left closing the door behind him. What the hell was that supposed to mean? They were friends all this time, did he not enjoy their platonic friendship? There was nothing wrong with it - though it did seem like sometimes they were dating because Rey can’t keep her hands to herself but that wasn’t the point. She loved Finn, he was her friend. He can’t just not be there for her. Rey was overthinking, he wasn’t leaving her..right? She followed him into the hall.

”What does that mean?”  

He turned around and shrugged his shoulders, his hands in his pockets. “I don’t know.” He turned back around and continued his way towards the elevator. Why did it feel like they were breaking up all over again? That sad, empty, isolated feeling of deja vú roamed the air around her. She sighed and continued her work, trying not to let it get to her. That didn’t stop her mind from thinking of last night. She was just at home having her daily glass of whine and thought it was a great idea to visit Finn. _Don’t worry_ she thought, _nothing will happen_ she said. But deep down she knew, because deep down she wanted to. And it sucks to think about because it made her the bad guy. She wasn’t the type to go around and cheat, it didn’t even feel like cheating. It felt like they were together again. Maybe that’s why Finn didn’t back away. He still missed her - no Rey, he’s in a relationship and so are you. They were just watching a movie together, a _movie_. She kept chugging beers while Finn stuffed his face with popcorn, they always hung out so it wasn’t anything new. What was different about _that_ night that caused it to happen? 

“Hey slow down!” Finn chuckled grabbing the bottle of beer from her hands. 

“I can’t slow down, I’m a machine!” 

“Yeah well this machine can’t drive home when she’s drunk.”

”I’m fine with staying.” She smiled. “Your house is warm and cozy.” She rested her head on his shoulder sticking her hand in the popcorn. His phone beeped. “Who’s that?”

”Rose.” 

“Oh.” She peaked a look at what he was texting but couldn’t see much from his hands. Not that it was her business anyway. He smelled of sweet ocean cologne, but just a hint. She hugged his arm. “Why don’t we hang out often anymore?”

”I don’t know,” he wrapped his arm around her. “we’re both busy with our relationships, we just don’t have the time.” He shrugged.

”We do now.”

” _You_ do, I was planning on a _solo_ movie night until you showed up.”

“Now it’s a duo movie night.” She cheesed. He smiled at her. “Not a date though.”

”Who said it was a date?”

”I’m letting you know it isn’t, in case you think it is.” She clarified.

”Should I think it’s a date?” He asked in a high pitch pivoting his head.

“No, it’s not - a date. We’re just two friends hanging out.” 

“Now I think it’s a date, are we on a date?” He teased. 

“No-“

”Because I’m with someone and I’m pretty sure she isn’t into polygyny, although I am flattered-“

”Finn!” She tapped him lightly.

”I’m just messing with you!” He laughed. “You know that.” They looked at each other smiling.   He looked so cute with his cute face. She booped his nose. “Did you really just do that?” He chuckled.

”Mhmm, what’re you gonna do about it?” She teased moving closer to him.

He looked at her oddly as she began to cross her eyes. ”You’re so drunk!” He laughed. 

“What? I don’t even drink.” 

“I just watched you chug at least three beers, at _least.”_

”How else am I supposed to get rid of it? You can have some, I have plenty.” she slurred holding out the bottle of beer to him. “No?”

He nodded. “No, Rey, I don’t drink.” 

“Aw, I missed you.” She rested her chin on his shoulder, gazing at him. “Do you miss me?” She asked barely keep lung her eyes open.

”I do.” He nodded. “I’m happy you’re here.”

”I’m happiest you’re here.” She smiled cuddling up against him. 

“This is my house, I’m gonna be here.” He laughed.

”I know.” She looked up at him and he looked at her. Their bodies facing each other as they leaned toward one another. She felt that familiar nervous feeling she always got when she was with him: the sweaty palm, dopey grin, racing heart, fluttering stomach. Rey pressed her lips against his kissing him softly, he kissed back toppling over her. She pulled his shirt off and they fell off the couch onto the floor giggling. It was just making out, then smooch smooch, kiss kiss, one thing led to another and they were doing the devils tango in Finn’s bedroom. Leading to Rey’s not-so-great morning. She still couldn’t believe she did it, even if it wasn’t that surprising. It always felt like her first time, with Finn. It was a _good_ first time. What was she going to tell Ben? Nothing. He would know nothing because it never happened. Fair and square. Rey wasn’t even happy with Finn at the moment so it didn’t matter, he pissed her off. After she was finished with work she spent some time at home trying to clean up. By trying she means taking a five hour nap hoping the house would magically be clean once she wakes up. Her ringtone interrupted her dreaming. She looked over to the caller id. It was Poe, huh it’s been a while. She pressed the green button and held the phone to her ear.

”Hello?” She sounded like a frog. 

”Rey, where are you?” He asked in a serious tone.

”What do you mean?” She rubbed her eyes and looked at them time. Holy shit, it’s was 7:56 p.m. not that she had anywhere to go. But damn she slept forever.

”Uh hello? I invited you to my birthday dinner party remember?”

”You did?” She looked at her calendar for the first time in months to see it written in bright colors. The hand writing was definitely Poe’s. “Ah shit, you did. I mean,” she cleared her throat. “of course you did. I’m on my way right now.” She leaped off her bed and into her closet, then thought for a second. “Wait is Finn going to be there?”

”Of course he’s my best friend.” 

“Do you know when he’s not going to be there?”

”Why?”

If it wasn’t clear enough. ”I don’t want him to be there.”

“What do you mean? He’s our best friend, why wouldn’t you want Finn to be there?” 

She pinched the bridge of her nose not wanting to get into detail about it. Not wanting to think about it, or him. “I’m going through a rough patch right now, and he’s apart of it.” She sighed. Sensing his look of disbelief through the phone. “Look, you’re my friend and I don’t want to cause any trouble especially today. So, I’ll arrive after Finn leaves.”

”Rey it’s a dinner party, and you know Finn usually stays back to help clean up.”

She did know that. “Alright I’m on my way.” She hung up and looked for something to wear. There wasn’t much, she didn’t have much. And she didn’t want to wear anything too nice, just in case Finn thinks she wants him back. Even though the previous night kind of gives that away - not saying she wanted him back. She put on a cute little floral dress and a leather jacket with some boots. She took her sweet time driving to the restaurant. Mostly because she didn’t know where it was. Rey hopes she wasn’t going to miss it, otherwise she got dressed for nothing. She already drove past ten restaurants already and the GPS wasn’t helping, it kept refreshing repeatedly. Eventually Rey decided to park at a random restaurant and see if she could find them. The last restaurant looked fairly expensive and way out of Rey’s budget. The food smelled good and everyone looked rich as fuck, she had hoped that the group wasn’t there but of course, they were. Everyone was sitting at a large table in a private area sharing laughs. There was Poe, Kaydel, Finn, Rose and Paige. Compared to all of them, she was a bit under dressed. Maybe she should’ve wore something that was _too_ nice instead of focusing on what Finn would think. Everyone looked so pure and elegant while Rey looks like she just arrived from a spring cookout and didn’t have time to change. Poe saw her first, he smiled and walked over.

"Glad you finally made it." 

"Happy birthday mate." she lightly slapped his arm. He showed her to her seat and pulled it out like a gentlemen. She sat down seeing that Finn was further away from her, that was - a relief, she guessed. He looked like he was having fun with _Rose,_ sharing laughs and sharing food and drinks and love and happiness...Where was Rey’s happiness. She ignored them because that’s the only thing she could do. Her and Finn were like that at a point in their lives and Rey couldn’t let that go. They used to hold hands under the table and play pranks on Poe, they giggled at one another when they looked at each other because they were embracing the others company. They played hide and seek when the other wasn’t late for a date, they did all of those things and now it’s like none of it happened. They were so cold toward each other now, distant. It was like those goofy naive spirits have left to another place because this place has withered to an estranged dark eerie place. Never mind that, she turned to Poe. "Did you order yet?"

"No, we were waiting for you."

"Thanks." she picked up the menu and looked through it, wanting to buy literally everything. It all looked so good, yet it was all so expensive l, why did Poe pick this place? Looking at all the food options made her realize how hungry she really was. She felt eyes staring at her and lowered her menu to see Finn glaring at her, he looked away when she noticed. Immediately, she grew annoyed for no reason. He shouldn't be looking at her, he was with someone. Rey shouldn’t be his center of attention no matter the situation they’re in. Actually, looking around, no one was really talking. Finn and Rose weren't even talking to each other, no one was talking to each other. Why? They usually had the world to talk about but now, for some reason, they didn't. Rey rolled her eyes at Finn and continued to look at the menu. Her phone buzzed in her pocket, it was Ben.

"Where u at?" the text read. She couldn't tell him where she was, none of her friends liked him. And knowing Ben, he would come with no fucks given about how everyone else feels. They all have a bad history with him and by the end of the dinner, everyone would probably be at his throat.

"Out." she sent. She pulled her jacket closed and hugged herself feeling a draft over her. Great, Poe sat her right under the air conditioner. She shivered a bit. Fun fact about Rey, she's highly sensitive to the cold. Another reason she doesn't like to spend her time alone, even if it felt warm the vibe was cold. Finn know's that about her, he was perfectly protective of her. Now he was 'perfectly protective' over Rose. Of course, he still cared about Rey but - it wasn't the same. She missed him. The waiter came by and everyone ordered their meals. Listening to their orders she didn’t realize how hungry she was. Her muscles were tense because she was still kind of asleep, maybe this was a dream, she hoped it was a dream. Rey _would_ start a conversation if she knew where to start or what to say. Instead she sat there awkwardly like everyone else, listening to the murmuring of the customers and clanging of silverware outside the area they were sitting.

"So, Rey," Poe started. "it's been a while. How have you been?"

"I'm - good, I'm good. Nothing much has really changed. You?"

He looked at her, then at Finn with suspicion in his eyes like he was trying to figure out what the issue was. He didn’t need to know what it was, it wasn’t his business. It wasn’t anyone’s business. She nodded her head for him not to interfere and he returned her a respected decision nod looking towards Finn. 

"Finn," he said pretty loudly. Everyone looked at him. "how have you been?" Rey's heart began to pound. 

"I'm uh - good." he seemed nervous, rubbing his clammy hands on his pants and his eyes shifting from Rey to Poe. He was making things too obvious between them. 

"Are you?" he asked.

Finn nodded. “Yeah, you enjoying your birthday?”

”I’m not sure.” Everyone asked him why, distracting him from Finn and Rey, he was acting real skeptical about the two since Rey’s arrival. Does he know what happened between them?


	2. The Issue Is on the Table

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Poe realizes his friends are having issues and decides to take action.

Dinner was over and Rey has never felt more relieved. That has got to be the most awkward experience she’s ever had in her life. Finn was quiet and because He was quiet, Poe was quiet and because he was quiet, everyone else was quiet. They all sat there eating, the food was good. Rey noticed whenever she was around Rose wasn’t intimate with Finn, it was like they weren’t even together in public. Maybe they weren’t, she watched them say goodbye to everyone. It looked like she wasn’t the only who was excited to leave. Their was a sigh of relief from everyone as they began to exit out the doors. Of course, Finn stayed back to help clean up even though someone was already being payed to do so. Rey bit her lip and looked around a bit lost. She didn't know what to do, everyone was leaving and she wasn't ready to end the night yet. She checked her phone, Ben left her on read. Dude was petty as fuck when she gave him one word replies, he's so over sensitive. He wasn't going to be visiting her anytime soon, which meant she would have to spend the night alone in the dark. A place where she would get sleep paralysis often because of the unfortunate tragedies of her childhood. Finn knew this about her, Ben didn't he just thought she was a 'naughty girl' who liked to  have fun a lot. When, really, she was just trying to get him to stay the night. She was always trying to get someone to stay, anyone really. Since Finn wasn't there to protect her with his warm spooning she had to suffer the consequences of waking up in the middle of the night, not being able to move, and seeing lovely shadow creatures dancing around her. Even thinking about it might trigger some nightmares for the night. 

"Rey." Finn said suddenly, catching her attention. He motioned for her to come toward him. As she did, she noticed it was just them and Poe. Everyone else was gone, even Rose.

She put her hand on her hip. "I thought we weren't friends." she reminded. 

"Rey, come on, I just wanted to ask you something." He leaned toward her. "We're not gonna speak of last night, right?"

"I don't know, Finn, I just don't know." she shrugged. He sighed and gave her a look. Of course she wasn’t going to tell anyone, she wasn’t stupid. That would ruin both their reputations and Rey just wasn't for that. He wasn’t going to be direct with her, so she wasn’t going to be direst either. Plain and simple. 

“Rey, just tell me your aren’t going to.”

”I’m not telling you anything!” She hissed silently. “You don’t want to be friends so we won’t be. In fact, we don’t have to speak to each other again!” Just as she whipped around to leave she saw Poe standing there in a disappointing stance with his head down and hands on his hips. 

He looked up at them. “You two, explain.”

Rey looked at Finn who was looking at her then at Poe, he looked like he just caught smuggling something for the first time, terrified.  “Explain what?” he asked, chuckling insincerely. Playing dumb was the dumbest thing he can do right now. It was obvious there was something going on. He’s been on their ass since their conversation on the phone. 

“The tension between you guys has been thick since Rey got here. What’s going on with you two?”

She looked at Finn and figured the next words out of his mouth will probably be the truth. “We’re just not friends, that’s all.” She shrugged before moving past him to the door. Poe grabbed her arm and pulled her back.

”Rey, your not telling me the truth.”

”I _am_ telling you the truth, Finn and I aren’t on good terms. We decided it’s best to ignore one another."

”Fuck that,” he sat her down next to Finn. “you two are supposed to be friends. Good friends - best friends. So all this bullshit your talking to me about you not being on good terms is fucking childish.”

”You don’t get it.”

”I think I do-“

”No you don’t Poe! We’re not children, you can’t put us on timeout together and expect us to make up. Say what you want I’m not talking to him.” She crossed her arms and looked away from them.

”What’d you do to her?” He asked.

”I didn’t do anything.” Finn announced, Rey could tell by the volume of his voice he was looking at her. He had some nerve. “It all just kind of happened didn’t it, Rey? That’s what you think? You just kind of showed up and I _let_ you in? It can’t be your fault,” he shrugged. “it’s never your fault.”

She wasn’t going to let that slide, she faced him. “Don’t do that,”

”Do what?”

”Do that thing where you guilt trip me into placing the blame on myself, we had this discussion already Finn, it’s my fault just as much as it’s yours. We were fine, happy in fact, then things screwed up and how is that _only_ my fault? Huh? How Finn?” She argued. 

“I was trying to do that right thing and-“

“No, it’s not just my fault you were there you know what happened and you didn’t stop it-“ They yelled over each other causing a scene. Everyone looked over at them but they didn’t care, they were too invested in the argument that they were no longer in their seats.

”Alright, Alright, that’s enough!” Poe demanded sternly. “I don’t know what happened and, frankly, I don’t need give a shit. This thing, this back and forth you guys are doing, needs to end.” They both sighed and rolled their eyes facing away from each other like children.  "You guys were friends, like yesterday."

"Well we'd still _be_ friends if one friend understood the concept of a solo movie night, maybe if that friend didn't drink too much juice they would make mature decisions. That friend would have been with their new best friend and not the apparent sucker of a best friend she used to have. A best friend, that has moved on and found a new best friend so that they could be happy. A best friend, whose also _forgiven_ their old best friend and was _happy_ when that best friend found someone that supposedly made them happy even though we both know that's a lie."

Rey scoffed. "Oh god here you go again! You always have to bring him into this don't you? Ugh, you're so delusional, I-" she clenched her fist and grunted. "Fuck you just get me so frustrated!"

"You don't have to worry about getting frustrated anymore, because we don't have to speak ever again!"

"Good." 

Finn turned around to leave but Poe sat them back down. "No, we're not done here." He looked at both of them, disappointed and more confused than he's ever been in his entire life. "You two need friend therapy."

"What?" They both said. "That's a thing?" Finn asked.

"It is, and you bother are going to it because if you don't," he handed them each a card it had all his wife, Jessika's, information. She was a couples therapist who worked at crazy hours,  "I will find you. I'm going to schedule an appointment and you two better be there." he headed toward the exit. "I'll text you the details later."

"Where are you going?"

"Home, it's getting late." he walked out, the door closing behind him. Finn and Rey looked at each other, not knowing what to do.

"See what you did?" Finn blamed.

"What I did, we're in this situation because of _you_!" she sneered. They began barking over each other silently once again.The waiters arrived and cleared out the table as they horsed at each other. Blaming one another for the actions they both committed. The manager walked up to them. 

"You guys gotta go, we're gonna be closing soon and you're causing a disturbance to the guest."

They looked at everyone staring at them, feeling embarrassed. They walked out into the night, it was getting chilly and Rey was already starting to feel sick after sitting under the air conditioning. She felt her throat tighten and her nose stuff up. She grabbed a tissue and made her way to her car. All the exhaustion hit her making her suddenly extremely tired. 

"Rey!" Finn shouted. What did he want? She turned to look at him standing at the entrance. "Can I uh.." he looked down as to hold back the question. Before Rey could ask what he was to say, he said it. "...can I get a ride?"

She chuckled to herself, it was funny how they were just screaming at each other and now he needs something from her. "I thought we weren't speaking?" He shrugged and continued to wait for an answer. The asshole and Rey thing to do would be to leave him, because he pissed her off and she wasn't happy with him at the moment. But for some reason she motioned for him to get in. What the fuck Rey? She watched as he got into the passengers seat a bit embarrassed, she hasn't cleaned the car in almost six months. Which is actually how long Finn's been with Rose, isn't that funny? She started the car and began to back up when he stopped her.

"Seat belt." he said holding his arm in front of her.

She looked at him. "What?"

"Seat belt, put it on."

"You're joking-"

"I'm not, if we get in an accident and you fly out I can't save you. Put it on." he repeated. She rolled her eyes and did as told to get him to shut up. The ride was quiet and felt long. Rey turned on the radio to make it less awkward. Finn started dancing and singing to the music and she couldn't help but laugh. He grabbed her hand and clapped hers with his. "Come on Rey sing with me girl! Cel-abration time come on!"

She smiled at him, her cheeks boiling red. She's gotta give it to him, no matter how much they argued, they couldn't stay mad at each other. Although she still was upset with him, that didn't stop her from beaming when she saw him having a good time. It didn't take very much for him to have a good time, that's what Rey liked about him. She joined him in singing the song making funny voices as she sang. Finn followed her along on that making the ride comical and indulging for both of them. A night to remember, sort of. The ride continued and soon enough, before they knew it, she pulled into Finn's driveway. 

Rey parked the car and looked at him. "We're here."

"Yup." he shifted in his seat and looked at her.

"What?" she smiled. "Aren't you gonna go?"

"In a minute." he assured. They looked at each other longingly. Rey closed her eyes getting lost in the music.

”I love this song.” She positioned her head forward, bobbing to the music. “How long is ‘in a minute’ going to last?”

”Why? You want me to leave?” 

She shrugged. “Not really, but you have to go.” She looked at him. “Don’t you?”

He faced her. ”You’re just trying to get me to stay, aren’t you?” 

“I don’t know,” she turned toward him. “am I?”

”Here we go again with the I don’t knows.”

”You started it.” She chuckled. 

“We can’t not be friends Rey, we just can’t. No matter what I’ll stick with you, because what else am I here for?”

”I can take care of myself.”

”I know, that’s what I love about you.” He smiled. Her whole body grew warm making her suddenly hot. He said love in present tense, he still loved her. That’s why he didn’t deny the night before.

”Well,” they sat up. “it’s pretty late and I think you should get some rest.” She suggested. “I’m gonna head home and do the same.”

”Okay, well, thanks for the ride.” 

“Yeah.” They prepared themselves to move but didn’t leave. Finn didn’t get out of the car and Rey didn’t force him out. She didn’t want him out. And he didn’t want her gone. They smiled at each other trying not to make it seem to obvious.

"..I'm sorry, about earlier. I was really frustrated."

"Me too. We really fucked up Poe's dinner huh?" they laughed. "I am sorry though.." she looked at him. With nothing but the moonlight shining against his smooth skin. Rey fought the urge to caress his cheek. Even after they broke up he still gave her the tingles. Then, out of nowhere, Finn pressed his lips against hers. Surprised, she didn't back away. His soft plump lips were too good to decline, and it wasn't like she didn't want him any less. Being the leader this time, Rey moved closer to him sitting on his lap, holding his face as he held her waist. She smiled being in his arms.

They let go, looking at one another. “I don’t want to leave alone.” She whispered.

”You won't have to.” He promised kissing her again. 

* * *

Rey cuddled up against a warm figure in her sleep, thinking maybe it was Ben. Feeling his chest sink and rise every second, she opened her eyes noticing that the figure was Finn and she had once again slept with him. She was in her apartment, her trashy apartment. He looked so peaceful sleeping next to her, like a guardian angel. Shit, they aren’t together anymore, Rey forgot about that for a second. What had she done? What did Finn do, he laid one on her first. There were no excuses this time, they were both sober when it happened. She sat up and looked around, fuck this time all of their clothes were on the floor lying across the room. She shook Finn awake aggressively, then tried to reach for her clothes from the bed without showing anything. Even though Finns already seen everything. 

“Finn get up!” She shouted.

He jolted awake and looked around noticing he wasn't where he thought he was. “Shit..” he sighed. 

“Get your clothes and get out.” She demanded still trying to reach for her clothes on the floor. Finn stood up and grabbed his clothes dragging her blanket along with him. It unraveled on her and she rolled off the bed so he didn’t see.

”FINN!” She yelled. He tossed her clothes to her from the other side landing it on her head. But she didn’t get dressed, she laid there thinking about life. Thinking about the decisions she’s made, and what she would do to change them altogether. She put her clothes on slowly and sadly. When she was done, Finn was still struggling to put his tie on.

”You think Rose is going to worry about a tie?” She asked doubtfully, but helped him anyway. 

He sighed. “Why does this keep happening? Two nights in a row already.” She shrugged continuing to tie his tie. “Rey I want to be in a clean relationship, and this thing it really gets in the way of that.” She finished his tie and stepped back to hear him out. “I can’t look at Rose without thinking she’s gonna find out what happened, and now that we did it again - I’m not sure I can keep it from her.”

Rey put her hand on her hip looking at him like he was a complete idiot. “And you think telling her is going to make things better for you two? You’re gonna tell her what happened and she’s gonna be grateful? Come on Finn, this isn’t candy land.”

“I know that’s not what’s going to happen but, I don’t want to hide anything from her.” He followed her to the kitchen.

”You’re not hiding anything, it’s not her business.”

”How is it not her business? We’re together, _we_ have sex-

“Don’t say that.”

”-and she doesn’t have the right to know I’m fucking someone else?”

”She does! But what I’m trying to understand at your level, is what you think you’re going to get after telling her. Hm?” He lost his gaze with her giving all his attention to the cracked wood floor. Rey sighed and walked up to him, holding his arms. “Look you’re both good, sweet people. But if you tell her you’re gonna break her heart, and that is gonna break yours. Plus if you say something she’s gonna cry to her sister and her sister is going to tell everyone to get back at you making you seem like the biggest dick ever.”

His eyes averted up at her. “If you’re trying to get me not to rat you out I won’t say who it was with.”

”No, but thanks. I’m saying don’t tell her.” She moved closer. “Doing the right thing isn’t always the best thing.”

”When did you get good at advice?” He smiled.

“Since I’ve had nothing better to do.” She chuckled. “I spend most of my time alone being bored shit-less.”

”Don’t you have Ben?”

”He’s mad because I won’t give him a key.” She let go of him and began to take out a bowl and spoon from the cup burbs.

“Why won’t you get him one?” He sat on the bar stool and folded his hands on the counter in front of him. 

“Because, I’m not ready for that, we just started dating like three months ago.” She pulled a cereal box out of the cupboard and poured some into the bowl finding that she was out of cereal.

”We moved in together that fast.” He reminded helping her find something to eat.

”Yeah, but that’s because I-“ she stopped herself. Knowing that if she said anything he would diffuse it.

“Because what?” 

“Nothing.” She shook her head. 

“So what I’m hearing is, I’m here because you were too scared to be alone.”

”Well-“

”And the other night you showed up to my house, drunk.” He reminded. “Because you were ‘ _too_ _scared’_ to be alone?”

“Finn I-“ 

“I feel like I’m being used Rey.”

”Why?”

”Because you only seem to come to me when there’s nothing left. I’m just a pillow to cuddle when there’s no one else around. That’s all this is?” He chuckled sarcastically. “That’s what this was all along? Was our whole relationship a sham?”

”No, it wasn’t!” She argued, her voice cracking as she tried not to cry. “You know it wasn’t, I couldn’t fake what we had!” 

“Rey I’m not sure, you know what your doing. You don’t know what you want or what you need.”

”I know exactly what I want!” She cried. “I want y-“

” _Don’t..._ say it, because you don’t mean it. I know you don’t. You don’t care about anyone but yourself.“

”That’s not true! You’re just saying that because your upset.”

”I can’t - I can’t even look at you right now.” He headed towards the door.

”Where are you going?” 

“To my girlfriend, because you and I are finished.” He opened the door and slammed it behind him. Rey put her back against the counter and slid to the floor. Sitting in a puddle of her own tears she stayed there, despite her hunger. There she stayed for hours. It was different when Rey was upset at him, because she was never really angry. But when he was upset, it was serious. She had crossed a line and so did he. He accused her of something horrible, Rey wasn’t the type to use people. She would never do that and Finn was aware that she wouldn’t. He knew the truth, but couldn’t handle it. Why? Why couldn’t he? Is it because he was with someone else or the other round? All her greatest fears were coming true, that feeling of isolation crept back on her and she felt a load of emotions against herself turning her into the villain. She rubbed her face wanting to scratch it off. Rey wanted Finn, she needed him especially now. But he’s gone, all her fears happened because she feared them. Was there any point in anything now? Her phone rang. It was work. She picked it up and held it toward her ear.

”Hello?” She croaked.

”Hey Rey, we just wanted to know if your coming into today?” Her boss asked.

“No, I - I’m taking some time..off.” 

“Okay, yeah sure, well have a good rest of your day.”

She hung up. “Fuck you.” She threw her phone across the kitchen before lying down on the cold dirty floor because that’s how she felt, cold and dirty. After another hour passed by she asked herself why she was crying over a guy? Not even, a guy who wanted nothing to do with her. She isn’t the kind of girl to do that, so why do it now? Fuck Finn, it was his loss. For all she knows he was using her for sex. Yeah, fuck him. She picked up her phone and dialed Ben's number, her actual boyfriend. The man who _she_ can rely on.

”Can you come over? I’m kind of having a break down and - well I need someone there for me.” She sniffled.

”Yeah, I’ll be right there.” He said. Ben wasn’t the best boyfriend ever, but he was - something and something was so much better than nothing. He was just an overall bad guy, he smoked, did drugs, and was a fucking dick to her and her friends. But, like said, being in the dark with someone by your side is much better than facing it alone. Unless that person is completely brain washed by the dark, then your convinced that their by your side when really it’s just the dark forming into something to keep you there. Wow, that was really deep. Any who, Ben came over and didn’t be really help her feel better but kept her mind off things. He wasn’t the consoling type, he didn’t like personal talk or serious talk. He was just there for fun and so was Rey. They sat there on the couch staring at the pitch black TV. 

“Want some kush?” He asked holding it out to her. Rey looked at him in a ‘you're joking right’ way. But it would help her cope. No - she wasn't that type of person. She snatched it from him and put it in her mouth, not know where to go from there. So she inhaled but she inhaled too hard and choked. Ben took it from her and laughed. 

“This definitely isn’t your thing, you’ll get used to it.”

”I’m not taking that again.” She coughed. 

“Yeah okay, that’s what they all say.” 

“You mean all your toxic friends who can’t get their lives together?” 

“Yeah, those.” He chuckled. “Here, take another whiff.”  

“No.” She nodded pushing it away. "I think I'm good."

"What it's not working? I've got molly in my trunk, you'd have to pay for it though."

"Are you serious?"

"What? I've got clients who depend on me. That shit's important." He lit a cigarette. Rey snatched the lighter from his hand.

"Alright that's enough, I don't need the whole place smelling like weed." 

He looked at her as if she was more different than usually. "Alright, I'll take it outside." he stood up. "You seem to want to be alone anyway." he puffed a cloud of smoke into the room before exiting out the door. She sunk in the couch letting the high take over her, thinking about last night like it was a dream. The giggles, the rolling around in bed - all a dream. Another good dream, that she couldn't seem to bring to life. She sunk in further, her eyes going dim and pupils dilating. She felt more relaxed but could still feel the pain of her aching heart, there was just nothing to do about it at the moment. She looked at the door, it didn't seem like Ben was coming back. So she would be sleeping in her apartment alone, but she didn't care. She actually, surprisingly, felt good about it - about everything. She closed her eyes and let her mind take over her body, thinking about the craziest things like where all the world languages came from? Did they show up at of nowhere or did someone just pop up and asked como esta? Those questions helped keep her mind off Finn, but to be safe she wont take the drug again let's hope. Rey opened her eyes to find that it was night, it felt like she was asleep for just a minute. Her phone had several text from Poe about the therapy thing. He had sent her the address and date then proceeded to text her reminding her that if she didn't go he would literally kill her and Finn both by making them torture each other. A bit gruesome but, she got the point. She texted him letting her know that she'd be there, but not to expect them to be friends again. After texting him that she threw her phone and passed out again because there was nothing else to do.

* * *

It's been almost two weeks, Rey was preparing herself for the 'friend therapy' by looking her best. She wanted to show Finn that she didn't need him - or anyone to stay on her feet. She hasn't heard or spoken to him since the fight and honestly she wanted to keep it that way, but for Poe's sake she was going to go. She looked like a professional, independent, _responsible_ woman and she was listening to the perfect music to feel that way. She sprayed herself about fifty times with perfume, grabbed her purse and headed out the door. Then came back when she realized she forgot her phone and her car keys, but then realized she couldn't open the door because she locked it and her house keys are connected to her car keys. After an hour her landlord came and unlocked it, she grabbed her stuff and made her way to the office, but got stuck in traffic. It seemed like the universe didn't want her to this session. Maybe she should just turn around and go back home, it'd be better there anyway. She thought about what Poe said, Finn would definitely tell him if she didn't go. What if he didn't? She would tell Poe that he didn't, and - maybe the therapist would snitch too. Rey figured she should just go, she was already halfway there anyway. At least it was a sunny day, actually, scratch that the sun was burning her eyes. Actually, scratch that, perfect day for her new butterfly shades. She put them on feeling powerful as she parked her car, it didn't matter that she ended up wearing them inside, she looked flawless. She signed in and walked into the room where Finn was already sitting on the couch biting his nails, he was nervous. They stood up at her presence. 

"You must be Rey." Jessika said as if she didn't know who they were. They shook hands. "Please, sit." Rey moved to the couch not even glancing at Finn, she sat as far away from him as possible and began biting her nails. Jessika, folded her hands resting them upon her folded legs. "I can already feel the tension between you two. And please," she held her index finger up. "refer me as Dr. J in this building." They both looked up at her. "What happened?"

"Oh, we're just - diving right in?" Rey laughed nervously. "Um - okay well, I guess I'll go first. Finn and I have been friends for..a long time, but shit happens and now we're not."

"What type of.. _shit_?"

She shrugged. "The kind that end's friendships."

Dr. J shifted in her seat moving closer to the edge of it. "You can tell me, nothing my patients reveal leaves this room."

Rey thought for a second, debating on whether or not she should tell her. It wasn't her business, but she was there to help. "We made a mistake." she shrugged. "A big one, that _some_ people can't get over."

"' _Some_ people' are trying to keep their relationships healthy," Finn argued looking at the therapist. "they actually care about how others might feel about the actions they produce."

"The other people _do_ care, they're just more mature about situations and fixing them." Rey defended. "Rather than freaking out and placing the blame on everyone else." 

He looked at her. "I _am_ mature, more mature than you'll ever be Rey."

"You sure about that? Because a week ago you were just complaining to me about something that could've been resolved if you just let it go."

"That wasn't something you can just let go! And you were immature to think it was!"

She sunk into the corner of the couch and crossed her arms. "I'm not immature, look how I'm dressed"

"Oh please, Rey, style has nothing to do with it. Look where you live."

"What's wrong with where I live?"

"You and I both know you could be living somewhere way better than that and your job, you deliver meals to patients everyday."

"What's wrong with that?" she scoffed.

"You could do so much better! You have so much potential and you're throwing it all away and for what Rey? For what?" 

"Okay, I think I've heard enough." Dr. J stated, her hands gripping the edge of her chair. "What I seem to be seeing between you two isn't anger..it's fear." They both sighed and shook their heads at each other. "It hurts when you see the other fail."

"You're right, I don't want to see Finn fail." she stood up. "But it's _my_ fault he did, I made him fail, me. If only I can go back in time and change things I would, I'd change everything to make it back to where I made my very first mistake with him. The mistake that caused this all, but time machines don't exist and neither does our friendship!" she rambled, she plopped back on the couch grabbing a pillow beneath her armpit. "Not anymore." It hurt to say it but it was true.

"It seems that this relationship is over." she sat back. 

"It is."

"Very much." Finn added. 

"Well, Finn how does that make you feel." she took out a notebook and pen.

He looked at her and shrugged. "I mean, how should I feel? I lost someone who's important to me and - I don't know. I mean, I have plenty of other people in my life but y'know it's not the same."

"I get it, and Rey what about you?"

She hugged the pillow looking the other way, out the window. "You know, I'm upset but maybe it's for the best." she shrugged and looked at him. "You know after everything, it seems that we shouldn't. I'm the toxic one in this relationship, so..it's best if I just leave." 

"I don't want you to though," he turned toward her and scooted closer, sympathy in his eyes. "Rey I want us to stay friends."

"We can't." she shrugged. "I'm too much of a mess, you deserve so much more."

" _You_ deserve more. So much more, I have such hope for you and what your doing it isn't good. You can do better and I can help you do better." 

"Finn, you know whenever we come together _something_ happens. I don't want to cause you any trouble."

"Interesting..very interesting." Dr. J commented. They looked at her. "Sorry, go on."

"Rey you can't cause me any trouble, it's impossible. Thing's may be complicated between us from time to time.."

"Finn.."

"-but at the end of the day, we'll stick together." They looked at each other, sparks glimmering in their eyes and electricity flowing around them.

"I was wrong, so wrong." Dr. J claimed. She pointed at them both with her pen, looking through her notes. "You two clearly have or have been in _or_ want a sensual relationship." They looked at her, afraid of what she was going to say next. "You aren't mad at each other, you're sexually frustrated." They looked at one another, then back at her shifting away from each other uncomfortably. 

"I don't think-

"We're not-

"No." they said over each other.

"Oh yes, it's true, it's as clear as day. But, something is keeping you two from - intervening."

"Well-

"Nothing is-"

Her eyes went wide. "Unless you two have already done it? That would explain the constant arguments, you're mortified of the consequences those actions might cause resulting in unreadable emotions between you two, which then led to where you are now. You guys are in denial." They both went silent, ashamed and confused at what had just been delivered. This woman was good at her job - and reading people. But that wasn't necessarily all of it. 

"We broke up, we're both with - other people." Finn admitted. 

"But, that didn't stop you from continuing your sexual relations?"

"We don't have any 'relations' in that sort of way, they were accidents."

"Accidents? As in plural?" Dr. J shot making them feel caught. Rey held on to the pillow tight as Finn began to chew at his nails. "Accidents don't happen again, unless they weren't accidents. You two coming together more than once is more than enough proof to my theory: You aren't over each other. Whatever caused the break up before clearly wasn't supposed to last as long as it did. I suppose the meeting other people part wasn't planned. What you two had is still there, and it's not going away unless you face it. That is - if you want it to. But, it seems to me that there's still some unfinished business here." she sat back proudly looking over at the two. Her phone alarm went off. 

"What now?" Finn asked.

"The sessions over," she shrugged. "the rest is up to you two."


	3. What Now?

The therapy session was over and, honestly, Rey felt great. It’s been a week and it was such a relief knowing that they wouldn't be at each others throats, or at each other’s -other stuff, anymore. Poe especially was so excited to have his two best friends back he got them both fruit baskets since he couldn’t see them in person. Dr. Jones helped a lot. She had her friend back, her best friend. Though, they didn’t really get exactly back to old terms, things were awkward, but they did their best to fill that out with jokes. It was just like old times, they were both equally happy to be in the others presence again. They hung out as often as they used to sort of, still keeping their distance. Rey began getting her life together with Finn's help. For instance, her and Ben have broken up because Rey realized that he was an asshole who only seemed to care about his success. When she broke it off with him he cursed her out and punched a fucking hole in her wall, _her_ wall. What a fucking dick. Finn's life hasn't changed much but, he's been happier with Rey around. But they never confronted one another about what that therapist had said to them. There they stood in her apartment, trying their best to clean it up. They've been there almost all day trying to get the place spotless, disinfecting things, wiping ever corner and crevice you never knew existed. Finn picked up trash and bottles with a pair of tongs as Rey just wore gloves, of course, he wore them too. He was being dramatic but Finn was always a bit extra. She watched as he pulled one of her bras from under the couch. It looked like the one she was wearing the night they - well you know. She's been looking for that bra. She snatched it from Finn's tongs as he sat there laughing his ass off. 

"Why the fuck is there a bra under your couch how does it even get there?" he chuckled.

"Well, Finn, you should ask yourself that question." she teased. They both knew he's the one who took it off her. He made that face he always made when he was embarrassed or flushed. Or concerned he could be concerned, she hasn’t cleaned under her couch in a week.

He put the final set of trash in the garbage bag and looked at her. "That's it, I hope." 

"Yeah," she dusted off her hands. "thanks for helping me _peanut_." 

"Oh, we're starting that again huh?" he laughed approaching her.

She put her hands on the back of her hips. "Yup, why not? That's what you are, my peanut."

"Just don't forget where it came from alright?"

"Me." She smirked. Knowing herself that she was the one who called him it first. 

He looked at her in disbelief. "No, me."

"Finn I called you it first-"

"I was the one who brought it up because of the shape of your head remember-" they argued over on another but not out of anger this time. They giggled at each other holding hands. 

"Thanks for helping me clean up. I know it's not something we usually do but.."

"Nah it's fine, maybe you can help me with my house it's a bit fucked up too."

Her eyes widened. "No way, Finn's house is a mess?"

"It's always a mess, I'm just goo at hiding it."

"Oh really?"

"Yeah I keep all my stuff in this portal I have in my closet that also connects to under my bed. It's just loads of shit under there."

"I'm learning so much about you." she conveyed. His phone rang, he put his stuff down and fished for his phone before answering. He held the phone by his ear, held his index finger to Rey and then went into the hallway. There was that feeling of an absent warm presence as the door closed behind him. She tied the two trash bags and waited for Finn to finish his conversation so she can make her way to the garbage chute.

"No I didn't ask her yet." he mentioned over the phone. Who was he talking to? Or about? "I will, I'll ask her. Okay, bye." he hung up giving Rey the cue to walk out. He stuck his phone in his pocket before helping her push the giant trash bag into the small chute.

”So,” Rey grunted shoving the bag. “what was that all about?”

”Oh it was Rose, she wanted to know if I asked you if you were interested in a redo birthday dinner for Poe? Since the last one was kind of suck-ish, mostly because of us." The bag sucked through the chute as if someone pulled it from the other side. "Her idea." 

They picked up the next bag and pushed. "Yeah, I'd be down for that. It'd be less awkward. Same restaurant?"

"Actually no, you and I are kind of banned from going there after we 'disturbed' the customers."

"What? That's ridiculous." she laughed. It was kind of funny. They pushed the bag into the chute and closed the hatched, dusting off their hands. "When is it?"

"Tonight at Lebris."

"Tonight!? Finn why didn't you say something earlier."

"Relax you still have time, plus it doesn't take much to make you look good." he patted her back. "See you later." he walked into the elevator and waved at her as the doors closed. The air grew cold as she entered her apartment. It was clean at least, but it made the place look even more empty and boring and plain. She just realized Finn didn't tell her what time the dinner was. It was probably the same time as it was last time. Lebris was a nice place, she always wanted to go there. It has five stars and amazing reviews. Rey decided to get ready since there was nothing better to do. This time, she would dress appropriate. Spending an hour in the shower jamming to loud music, she felt good about how tonight would go. She exited the bathroom, an entire cloud coming out with her. She didn't even realize how much hot water she used. After getting dressed and spraying herself with perfume and oils, she did her hair then looked at the time. She had a whole hour left before it was time to leave. Why did time have to be so slow? She face timed Finn to see what he was up to.

"Hey." he stroked his wet twist out of his face. 

"Hey." she smiled. "You getting ready?" 

"Yeah," he looked off camera then back at her. "just got out the shower now." 

"Oh, should I.."

"No, it's cool." he placed his phone down and looked at her oddly. "You already dressed?" he fled from the camera to put something on.

"Yeah, you didn't tell me what time it starts." 

"Sorry about that." he chuckled. Rey could see the movement of his arms as he put a shirt on. "It's the same as the first one."

"I figured...where's Rose?"

"Putting on make-up."

"Hi Rey!" a voice said from afar. Finn picked up the phone and a blur went on as he walked to the bathroom. Suddenly Rose appeared, her face close to the mirror as she applied eyeliner. 

"Hi Rose." Finn flipped the camera back onto his face and began walking away.

"She busy." he perked his lips. "Girl gotta put on her make up y'know she can't live without it." he joked making a funny voice. They all laughed including Rose in the background. They spoke some more and before they knew it, it was time to leave. 

"Oh shit, it's seven."

"It is?" Rey looked at the time. "How? It was just 6:43?" 

"Time flies when your with the man. I'll see you there, okay?"

"Alright, love you." 

"Love you too." they hung up. Rey sighed and looked around before making her way to the restaurant. The drive was short since it wasn’t very far from her house. There were valets all in front of it, for a second Rey questioner if she should get one but she knew she couldn’t afford it. Plus it’s be embarrassing since her car wasn’t ‘valet worthy.’ Instead she parked by the barbershop across the street. She was real excited and couldn’t wait to eat, she hadn’t all day. This time, she was the first one there. She sat at the large table waiting for everyone to arrive, watching funny videos on her phone. Soon, Finn and Rose showed up.

”Rey!” Rose cheered not hesitating to hug her. 

“Hey Rose,” she looked over at Finn who was waiting for a hug. “Finn.” They grabbed each other’s hands kissing both cheeks before all sitting down. Instead of last seating arrangements, they sat together away from the air conditioning. They talked about little things and told each other stories until everyone else arrived. Poe was, of course, the last person to arrive. He showed up with Han, Leia and Maz. 

“Hey there the birthday boy is!” Finn applauded going up to hug him. Rey stood behind him waiting for her turn.

”You two look better.” He smiled. “The session worked?”

”Yeah, you can say that.” Rey nodded. “We did most of the work.”

”That _is_ true.” Finn agreed. “She sat there taking notes while we screamed over each other, but oddly it helped.” 

“Good to know.”

They all sat down catching up like a family on thanksgiving. It was nice when they all spent time together like this, but it made Rey upset. Because time flies when your having fun and, in this case, she would go home alone after having the best company ever. Presumably it would be better for her to just enjoy the moment, so she did. She looked at Finn’s menu as if he had different options. He held it up in a way where you couldn’t see him, Rey leaned in so she wasn’t seen either.

“Oo look at that one!” She grabbed his arm in excitement pointing to the picture of lobster buttered with garlic with sweet and spicy sauce on the side. She swallowed the drool in her mouth. “Looks good.”

”Get it.” 

“What if I don’t like it?”

”We’ll share.” He shrugged, like it was nothing. Rey smiled at him before picking up the drink menu, those looked good. Some many flavours and colours and tiny umbrellas. She promised herself she was finished with alcohol so whatever she ordered would have to be a virgin, she pouted. What’s a drink without a little spice? She knew that if she started drinking she probably wouldn’t stop. 

“Finn, Rey, how are you guys it’s been a while since we’ve seen you.” Leia started.

”Yeah, well,” he looked at Rey. “we were facing some difficulties..”

”But everything is good now?” 

“Yeah, everything’s great.”

”Good.”

”I heard you guys went to couples therapy.” Han brought up.

”Friend therapy.” 

“Same thing. Leia and I tried that at one point, it didn’t work if you couldn’t tell.” Leia slapped his arm.

”It wasn’t necessarily the therapy that helped,” Rey explained. “we kind of just found a way back.”

”So your together again.” Maz blurted. Everyone stopped and looked over at them. Rose awkwardly put down her menu. Paige perked her lips in shock.

”No, Finns actually-“

”I’m with Rose.” He finished. All three of them never looked more confused. Rey could tell by their expressions this was something they weren’t expecting, and, being honest, nobody expected them together just like no one expected her and Ben. When Rey was dating Finn they would hang out with Rose from time to time but there wasn’t any chemistry or signs of them possibly hooking up. When they did Rey figured that they were always together behind her back, but Finn assured her that it was something that just happened. He wasn’t into her, but she was into him and he was too hurt to decline.

“Oh, sorry honey. I’m just so used to them being together.” Maz apologized. 

“How the hell is he with Rose?” Rey heard Han whisper to Leia. She shrugged her shoulders.

“You guys forgot we were dating? We’ve been together almost six months.” Rose expressed. 

“Six months? Isn’t that when you guys broke up.”

”Two weeks before yes.” Rey reminded softly. They all looked at each other with embarrassment. It was at that moment the waiter decided to ask for everyone’s orders. No matter how awkward they made it, she didn’t let that ruin the night. She wasn’t going to give Poe another bad birthday dinner. she put a smile on her face and changed the subject because talking about her previous boyfriend and his new girlfriend wasn’t a topic she was particularly interested in. This dinner was about Poe, not them.

“Poe, how’re you?”

“I’m good, I’d be better if we had our food though.” 

“Preach.” They all said. Finn was sitting next to her playing with the utensils out of boredom. Rey grabbed a fork and joined him in a fork fight making onomatopoeia effects with their mouths. Everyone looked at them like they were children, that’s how they acted when they were together, like children.

Their food arrived and everyone sighed with relief as the hot steaming plates were placed on the table. The delicious smell hit their noses making their mouths wet with drool. Han, Leia and Maz all tucked their napkins into their shirts and placed the other on their legs. Finn and Rey wasted no time digging into their food, neither did Poe. They were like pigs who haven’t eaten since birth. Finn put a little of Rey’s plate in his and a little of his in hers, he did the same with Rose and Poe and Paige and well everyone except the elders. They all gave him a dead look that told him not to dare. With the food in front of their faces they didn’t talk much unless they were passing each other food or sauce. A greedy bunch indeed. 

Rose and Paige went to take a bathroom break. Han held up a small bag of peanuts from his plate. “You guys still call each other that name? What was it?”

”Peanut? Yes we do.” Finn informed, cutting into his chicken. “She’s my peanut she’ll always be.” He smiled at her as she sipped her piña colada from her straw.

”Does Rose have a name?” Maz asked before stuffing her mouth with a piece of a waffle.

“No, Rose and I aren’t as close as Rey.”

”Alright hold on, since when did you like Rose in that way?” Leia asked sounding more rude then intended. 

“Well-“ he looked at Rey, afraid to admit what he was going to. She got up and walked to the bathroom giving him to explain himself. She had to pee anyway, she walked into a stall just as Rose and Paige walked out of theirs. They were talking about something that didn’t seem important but she listened anyway since there was nothing else to hear.

”So, yesterday I was going through a bin in our closet and you won’t believe what I saw.” It hurt to hear that they shared a closet. She couldn’t share a closet with Finn he has too many clothes. “There was a ring in one of the boxes.” Rey’s heart skipped a beat.

”You think he’s gonna propose?” Paige asked washing her hands.

”Maybe, what do I do?”

”What do you mean?”

”I mean what do I do? What about Rey?” The water stopped running.

”Rey broke up with him remember? I’m sure she wouldn’t mind. Anyway it isn’t about her, it’s about you two.”

”Okay.” She sighed. Rey listened to their footsteps as they walked out of the bathroom. She walked out of the stall and washed her hands. Finn’s proposing to Rose? This definitely wasn’t expected. It seems Finn really has moved on. All she can really do is be happy for them. But everything was going so fast between them, her and Finn were together for almost three years and he never said anything about proposing. Mostly because the thought scared Rey half to death just like everything else that comes with relationships. She walked back out to the table taking her time to pull her chair and sit on it. Paige whispered something into Poe’s ear and he made surprised face. But he glanced at Rey and not Finn. He looked back at Paige.

“Are you sure?” 

She nodded, then whispered back into his ear. His expression changed from surprised to doubtful.

”So if you guys aren’t together, what are you?” Maz asked. Rey grew nervous at that. She didn’t know what they were, and she was scared at what Finn might think they were.

”What do you mean?” He asked leaning in some more.

”Are you guys friends or..?”

“I mean..” Finn looked at her. He could tell that Rey wasn’t sure how to react or answer that. He looked at Maz who stuck a spoon in her mouth waiting for him to answer, everyone was waiting for an answer. “well - I mean - yeah yeah we’re friends.” His voice went higher with every word. “Right Rey?” 

“Yeah yeah.” Her voice was just as high as his. “We’re friends why wouldn’t we be?” They laughed at each other because they sounded funny. But no one else was laughing, they all looked at each other with looks. Being honest Rey didn’t know what to call them. They were friends yeah but they weren’t _just_ that, they weren’t too much more than that either. It’s complicated, but they’d figure it out. They had time. Right?

* * *

Wrong. After arriving home from work, Rey swore under her breath as she read the eviction letter on he door. They were kicking her out because of continuous noise complaints from her tenants. Just when you think you have nothing left to worry about, this happens. Nobody said anything before, why is it a problem now? Goddamn thin walls, they probably heard her argument between Finn and Ben when they broke up. The - moans..gross. It was probably best that she go, but she didn't have any ideas of where. This building was the cheapest building in town. She searched for cheaper ones in the area but found nothing, there had to be something. She just had to keep looking. She figured it was best not to tell anyone, hoping she'd find something in time and also because it was just too damn embarrassing. Rey wasn't the type to crash on peoples couches and say they'll stay for a week but end up staying the rest of their life. She was independent to find a place before thirty days was over. That was plenty of time. Hearing the elevator doors, open she quickly snatched the notice and stuffed it in her bag. She spun around to see Finn. He smiled at her greeting her with a hug. 

"What're you doing here?" she asked clutching onto her purse trying to cover the letter. He glanced at it then back at her noticing she didn't want him to see it. 

"You doing anything today?"

"Not really." she shrugged shifting her weight from leg to another. "Why?" 

"I'm not either and there's no one to hang with, everyone's at work."

"Oh, well I'm off so..maybe we can do something. That's what you wanted to do right?"

"Yeah."

"Okay, but I choose where we go." 

"I'm cool with that." he smiled. But he wasn't, because Rey took him to an ice skating rink to be funny. And it was hilarious watching him grabbed on to the ledge on his knees, barely being able to stand on his feet. Rey easily slid pass him spinning around. She grabbed onto him.

"Come on Finn, come center."

"No," he waved her away. "I'm not happy with you right now Rey." She laughed pulling him away from the wall by the back of his waist. "Rey, let go of me please!" he fretted. She didn't listen, she was not going to have him spend the entire time by the wall.

"Man up!” She grabbed his hands skating backwards to make him more comfortable. Although it wasn’t helping.

”Rey if I fall..”

”You won’t. Now I’m gonna let go-“

”Rey don’t you let go.” Her grip loosened as his tightened. “I’m not kidding Rey.”

“You’ll be fine.” She watched as he let go, holding his arms out to keep balance. The ice moving him backward because he couldn’t gain the guts to lift his foot up. “You’re doing it!” 

His legs began to spread. “Help.” 

She skated to him a little too fast bumping him further away. He reached out to her trying his hardest to stay on his feet. She skated towards him reaching out her hand, he grabbed it and pulled her to him holding her arm tight.

”Finn if I go down, I’m bringing you with me.”

”Rey I’m holding on to you so tight, gravity couldn’t pull you a part if it wanted, not even a black hole can snatch you away.”

She touched a spot on his neck making him flinch. Though he tried to hide it, Finn was one ticklish man and Rey knew all his sensitive parts. She skated away ignoring his calls to her by pretending to jam to the music. He tried to follow her and for a while he wasn’t getting it, it wasn’t until Rey picked up speed when he fell. She looked behind her to see him on his butt scrunching his face in pain. She went over to him.

”Are you okay?” She laughed extending her hand to help him. He looked at her running his bum, then pulled her down with him. “Finn!” She hollered hitting him.

”Don’t tickle me next time.” He warned.

”I was going to help you up you dick!” She stood back up giving him no help. She watched him try to rise to his feet without slipping. His butt was high in the air covered in ice, perfectly sculpting the outline of his arse. Her night was just getting better because of him. “Finn!” She laughed unable to get it out. 

“What?” He grabbed her hands and she helped him out still laughing, laughing loud enough for everyone in the arena to hear.

”You - you have ice on your - ass!” She cackled turning around to hide her snort. Finn busted out laughing. Rey turned around to look at him, embarrassed that he heard it. But it wasn’t the first time. “Oh shut up!” She hushed. He still laughed, in fact he was laughing much harder than she was. He pointed at her.

”You’ve got the same problem!” 

Rey looked at her behind to find a thick sheet of ice stuck to her butt. No wonder it felt so cold down there. She patted some of it off. Looking up Finn was somewhat skating toward her. She grabbed his hands to help him leading him around the ring. They were able to go around twice without any mishaps. Then he was finally able to do it on his own, with less fear than earlier. Rey was so proud of him, it was like watching a baby walk for the first time. 

“Okay, I did it, let’s go.” He led her out of the arena and they went to his house to hang out. They sat on the couch scrolling through their phones sharing a bowl of grapes, their legs folded on top of one another.

“I’m thinking of a number between...1 and 16.” Rey said sticking a grape in her mouth.

”12.” He blurted.

She stopped and looked at him as if he just told her everything about her. “How’d you know?”

He pointed to his temple. “I’m psychic.” He whispered. “My numbers from 1 to 10.”

”7.”

”Yup, we got that connection. You see you can’t just find what we have in anyone, it’s special. We vibe you know?”

That reminded her of Poe’s dinner night. “I’ve actually been meaning to ask you something on that topic.” He looked at her. Her eyebrows arched as she gazed at the beige carpet through the glass coffee table, she was hesitant to ask. “What are we?”

The question wasn’t exactly what he had expected.

”I mean, I know we’re friends - of course we are,” she clarified. “but...I don’t think that’s it..is it?” 

“Um.. well,” He exhaled leaning back on the couch. “I don’t think there really is a name for what we are. Yeah we’re friends, best friends even but..I know how you feel. We’re not _just_ that, there’s more.”

”We’re not - together.”

”No-“

”Yeah no-“

”Definitely not-“ They babbled over each other making the moment just a tad more awkward than it should have been. They sat there rocking their legs.

”I guess we’re just.. _peanuts_.” She shrugged.

“Ha. Yeah...” He chuckled. “Thumb war!” He shouted forcing her hand into a thumb fight. They laughed at each other blaming the other for cheating at the game. Later they ordered food and stuffed their faces completely until they couldn’t move their bodies, typical Finn and Rey night. But, eventually, all things come to a closing and Finn had to return home. As hard as it was to see him leave, she got a good view of his bum as he walked out the door. That was enough to make her night less lonely. She lied in the darkness of her room looking through the pictures they took at the ice skating ring, missing him already. She knew he was probably doing the same because he texted her. She texted back telling him she was going to bed even though she’s been telling herself that for an hour, but telling it to Finn made it official enough for her to fall asleep right after texting him. He was her peanut and she was his. 


	4. Secrets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey continues scavenging for a place to live and Finn grows suspicious of her.

Rey sat in the library scrolling through the computer while sipping her tea. She was looking for a houses or apartments, something near by so she could keep in touch with everyone. But there was nothing affordable within her budget. Hell, there was nothing affordable without her budget. The days were going down so fast, her only option was to move out of town. Every other town was an hour away from here, which is too far visits. Rey typed in town homes in Cora since it was the closest to where she was now. She sighed thinking of the long drives she would take to visit Finn and Poe and Leia and everyone. That’s a lot of gas and toll to pay. Maybe she could find a good job with better pay. Being a food deliverer at a hospital wasn’t her dream, now was her chance to find something she was passionate about. She wished she knew what that something was. She looked at the eviction notices deadline: four days. The best decision was to at least view the houses from the inside, the website didn't necessarily reveal the inside of the houses. There was one house that stood out, it was a cute little town home for rent with a driveway and a path. A townhouse would be the perfect break from this trashy apartment. She copied the owners information and added it to her phone. She wasn’t going to tell anyone about it, it would be too emotional to watch.

Rey walked out of the library into the windy day. The weather was getting colder and Rey was getting sicker. She carried a bag of tissues in her pocket and bundled herself up but still wasn’t feeling any better. No matter how much she chugged a bottle of medicine. Walking down the side walk she noticed a small woman picking up coins off the ground. No matter how eager she was to get home she’s helped her out. Then noticed that that small woman was Maz.

“Maz?” 

She looked up at her wearing sun glasses bigger than her face. She was almost unrecognizable.

”Hey Rey!” She greeted. Rey stood up and put the last pile of coins in her purse. She felt so powerful towering over the small elderly woman. “What’re you doing here?”

"I was about to ask you the same, don't you live out of town?"

"I do but..the your grocery store has good apples." she studied her. "What about you? What brings you into town?"

"Oh just - browsing, y'know?" she chuckled nervously. 

"Hm.." she looked off into the distance thinking of what to say next. Rey really wasn't in the mood to talk but there was no going back now. "..how're you and Finn?"

Rey pivoted her head unsure of what she meant by how they were doing. "We're..good."

"He still with that Rose girl?"

"Yup." she nodded uninterested in where the conversation was going. 

"No offense to her but, you two were better. I don't get why you broke up with him. Did he do something?"

"No, he didn't.." she sighed. "I was just - I -" she paused knowing whatever she would say next was going to effect where their relationship was going.

"You don't have to tell me." she informed pulling the strap of her purse to the back of her forearm. "I'm just going to say this: whatever happened that cause you to end things, probably wasn't worth losing him. Now you both are living false lives and it isn't fair.." she shook her head. "I can tell you both could be happier. That's all I'm saying, I know it isn't my business-"

"No, it's okay...thank you." 

She sighed and smiled at her placing her hand on her cheek. "I wish nothing but the best for _all_ of you."

Rey placed her hand on hers feeling comfort with her touch. Maz was, like all the other older people in her life, a perfect parent figure. She was kind, wise, and nurturing. She was exactly what Rey needed, especially now with the eviction. Everything seemed to be going downhill. She sat in the living room reading a book, something she hasn't had the time to do for a while, but she couldn't seem to focus. She was so anxious about the deadline of the eviction that it made her stomach bubble. She clutched her cold feet and threw her head back stress fully rubbing her forehead. Then there was a knock on the door. She wasn't expecting anyone, she took off her reading glasses, got up and looked through the peephole to see Rose's head waiting to be let in. Rey opened the door noticing her outfit, she looked like a unicorn threw up on her. Wearing sparkles of unorthodox bright colors that were not at all compatible with each other. 

"Hi," she exhaled smiling, her face grimaced and eyebrows lifted. "you busy?"

"No, not necessarily..why? Rey grew suspicious of what she needed, connecting the dots already.

"Well," she bounced, twiddling her fingers nervously. "we never hang out." she admitted shamefully. "Ever since Finn and I-" she stopped herself. "I just - don't want things to be awkward between us..and since your free I thought we could go clubbing?"

Rey stood there staring down at her not wanting to go anywhere but, maybe going somewhere would help relieve her stress. Actually, yeah it would a lot. "Okay." she shrugged revealing no emotion to her at all. She squealed excitedly and made her way inside. Rey watched her with a blank face, it's not that Rey didn't like her, it's that she didn't like her with Finn. Not even because they were together, they just weren't a match. It didn't work they didn't - vibe, not like that anyway.  

"Where's your room?" 

Rey pointed to it. "That way."

"Can I help you find an outfit?"

"Can I help you change out of yours?"

"What?" she asked trying to keep a smile at on her face.

Rey sighed. "Sorry that came out harsher than I meant it. I'm not really a fan of your shirt."

"You don't have to be. We're going out to have fun not find a husband. Our appearance doesn't matter." her face lit up. "I'm gonna find you an outfit and you're going to wear it, to prove my point."

"I'm afraid I'll pass on that." 

"I can let you pick a new outfit for me." she bribed. Rey wasn't one to take it, but she really was not rocking that shirt. It was provocative just looking at it. 

"Fine." she rolled her eyes as Rose clapped her hands making her way into her bedroom. She followed her and sat on the bed as she fished through her closet. It didn't take her long to find something, of course that something was Rey's least favorite shirt. A shirt that she buried deep within the bin's of clothes piled in there. "How'd you find that?"

"I looked, you're wearing this or..the shirt I'm wearing."

"I'm not wearing that Rose, forget it."

"Oh come on, it isn't even that bad!"

"You can go alone."

"Rey, this is supposed to be our night. Do it for Finn."

She looked at her, her brows snapping together. "What does he have to do with this?"

"How do you think he's going to feel when he finds out the two most important women in his life aren't getting along?" she stated giving her puppy dog eyes.

"Blackmailing won't work...but I'll do it anyway." she snatched the shirt from her and put it on. She couldn't believe Rose used Finn as a defense mechanism. It worked though, that sneaky girl. Rey got dressed then found Rose an outfit. A _cute_ one, a black fish netted crop top and some booty shorts. She even did her hair putting it in a but with little curls by her ears. Ending the whole look with a new face of make up. Rey finished the final touch with matte deep blood lipstick.

"And...done." she backed up to see her full profile. She looked amazing and Rey was proud of herself for that, she kissed the tip of her fingers. "Voila!" she turned her towards the mirror to see herself. Her face lit up as she moved closer.

"I look.."

"Amazing, beautiful, sexy?"

"Gorgeous." she looked at her. "Thank you Rey."

"No problem. Now," she grabbed her sweater. "let's party."  

They arrived to a club that Rey's never seen before. It must've been the one that was built recently, Rey always thought they were building a cafe but it doesn't seem like it. It was a good looking party room. The walls covered in lights off all types of colors, the crystal clear black floor so clean it was basically a mirror. People were dancing around, some making out in corners and others drowning themselves at the bar. Rey told herself she wasn't going to drink, but it looked so tempting. And she wasn't having a good time without a little push. Rose grabbed her arm.

”Come on let’s dance!” She began to pull her towards the dance floor but Rey didn’t move.

”I don’t know I should be here, everyone’s drinking and I’m trying to stay sober.”

”You don’t have to drink to have fun girl!”

” _I_ do,” she looked around at everyone. “this was a bad idea.”

”No Rey come on, your the only girlfriend I have other than Paige. And plus maybe there’s someone in here who feels the same as you, they were dragged here by their friend and they’re really cute just about your type?”

Rey chuckled sarcastically. “That’s what this is about? Finding me a man?”

”No, I’m just saying it’s something that can happen!” She grabbed her wrist and pulled her towards the dance floor. “Now let’s dance.”

Rey went with her, feeling annoyed. Maybe Rose was just trying to help her out, but Rey didn’t need help. She wasn't looking for a relationship she didn’t want to be in, she’s experienced enough of that already. Instead, she danced to the music not knowing what dance is without the buzz of alcohol running through her veins. She mostly stood there moving side to side, Rose was kind of going at it with a little rhythm. Rey looked up noticing a guy checking her out while sipping his drink. _What a creep_. She thought. But he was kind of attractive? Could be? Maybe. She shared a look with him, he smiled at her then looked away. There was no spark. Rey stopped dancing, giving up on trying to look like she knew what she was doing. She looked at the bar, people taking shots getting short bursts of energy. That was something she needed at the moment. Rose was too distracted to notice, so Rey helped herself over there and ordered a drink. A strong smell of cologne strike her nose and throat as someone sat next to her.

”On me.” A man said. She look at him, it was the guy from earlier. Long brown hair, brown eyes and glossy radiant skin. 

“You didn’t have to do that.” She shook her head giving him a little smile.

”I did, it’s the least I could’ve done for the most beautiful woman I ever met.” He smiled.

Rey looked at him doubtfully with an eyebrow raised. “How much have you had to drink?” 

He laughed. “Nothing, I’m honest without the alcohol.” The bartender placed her drink on the counter and he took it. “What’s your name?” 

“Whats yours?” 

“James.” He chuckled. 

“Well, James,” she exhaled. “I’m not looking for a relationship.”

”It doesn’t have to be one.” He slid the drink across the counter into her hands. Rey couldn’t believe what she was hearing, this good looking man just offered sex to her. She tried to get a read on him, maybe he was a douche trying to lure her in. Rey wasn’t going to go through that again. But maybe he was a good guy looking for a little fun. “Drink up.” He smiled and she did. She drank until she couldn’t anymore. One drank led to another and that one led to another and so on. She went back to the dance floor with Rose and they broke it down. Rey’s vision may have been blurry and she didn’t know where she was, but she was having fun. The music was loud, thumping through the speakers sending vibrations through the ground. Making everyone feel the music in their soul. It was truly amazing, until Rose got a call. Rey watched as she covered her ears trying to hear over the music what.

”I’m on my way!” She yelled then hung up.

”What happened?” Rey asked.

She turned to her with a look of concern. “Finn’s in the hospital.” 

Reys heart sank, and it felt like all the alcohol in her bloodstream drifted away. What happened? Is he okay? Was it serious? Why wasn't she there? All the thoughts came at her giving her anxiety.

”Why?” She asked following Rose to her car.

”I don’t know I just - told them I was coming.”

”Well I’m coming with you.”

”Yeah, okay, fine let’s just - hurry up.” They got into the car and drove for what felt like years. Rey shook her leg and bit her nails, she was terrified. And the fact that she had no context other than that he was in the hospital, made it worse. Rose kept telling herself he was going to be okay making Rey fret even more. They soon arrived at the hospital, Rose parked right in front of the entrance and they ran in. Running into the elevator, waiting, then finding his room a nurse lady was in there with a clip board.

”How is he? Is he okay?” Rose fretted.

”Finn..” Rey softly said seeing him in the bed.

”He’s fine, just a couple of stitches and he’ll be good to go. Nothing fatal.” She left the room. Finn waved at the two of them with a giant patched up finger. That was the reason he was there. He looked at Rose ecstatically.

”You look good, where’d you come from?” he asked.

Rey hit his arm. ”Don’t scare us like that!”

”Ow! I’m sorry,” he chuckled., rubbing where Rey had struck. “I wasn’t expecting you to be here. Why are you here?” He asked.

”We we’re having a girls night.” Rose admitted. She sighed. “Shit, I gotta go move the _fucking_ car before they tow it.” She ran out of the room. Finn looked at Rey. 

“What?” She said, her tone annoyed.

”Really? _You_ were hanging out with Rose?”

”It was her idea.” she sat down in the chair next to his bed.

”Was that outfit her idea too?” He laughed.

”It _was_.” She took a deep breath trying to let the annoyance go. “You really scared me Finn.”

”My bad, I was trying to explain to Rose why I was here but she didn’t let me finish. I’m sorry.” He put his hands on hers. She looked at his finger.

”What the fuck happened?”

”Cut myself trying to be a master chef. Gordon Ramsey still has nothing on me.” He stretched. Rey shook her head in embarrassment. “Sorry to worry,” he rubbed his thumb through her fingers. “what were you and Rose up to at the club?”

”Club stuff, I’m a little drunk.”

”Rey,” he sighed disappointingly. “I thought you were going to stop?” 

“Well things changed, because I’m my own person and _I’m_ the only one who know what’s best for me.”

He looked at her. “Okay.” He said and looked away. 

Rey rested her forehead on his bed looking at the ground. “Sorry, it’s been a hard week.” She sighed.

He looked at her again, his eyes brows meeting one another. “Why, what’s wrong?”

She looked up at him, stretching her arms like a cat on the bed. “Nothing. It’s nothing I’ll get over it.” 

“You know I’ve got your back, through thick and thin. If something’s up I can help you.”

”I know, but-“ she stopped herself before admitting too much information. He was waiting for her to finish. She gave him a puzzled look. “Why’re you in a hospital bed for your finger?”

He laughed scratching his chin. “Well, I was a bit dramatic when I entered the emergency room.”

”What’d you claim you couldn’t feel your legs?” She chuckled.

”Yes exactly that actually, how’d you know?” They laughed together. Rey could tell Finn knew something was wrong, but was grateful he didn’t badger her about it. They twiddled with each other’s fingers. "Thanks for coming," their eyes met. "it means a lot."

Rey tried not to let that drive her, but it didn't stop electricity from sparking between them. All through their fingertips. "Of course, I wanted to make sure your were safe." she informed. They looked at each other longingly, their eyes dilating at the others sight. Rey locked her fingers with his showing affection - platonic affection. Then Rose came back into the room a bit out of breath, kind of interrupting their moment. She didn't stay much longer however, she went back to the car after remembering she left her keys in the car. Rose's sudden presence reminded Rey about something. The engagement, she never spoke to Rey about it and Finn never seemed to bring it up. For some reason she felt it's because of what her and Finn used to be. They didn't want her to feel bad, but they should know by now that Rey just want's Finn to be happy no matter the decision he makes. She leaned towards the edge of the chair trying to find the correct words to say. 

"Um - Finn." she cleared her throat. He looked at her. She bit her lip feeling extremely anxious to ask such a simple question. "Do - you have something to tell me?"

"What do you mean?" he shifted toward her a bit. 

"Have any special event's being planned?"

He shook his head no looking at her confused. Maybe he hasn't proposed yet. That was good - well no it wasn't, but it was good for Rey. 

"Okay." she shook it off. 

"Why do you ask?"

"No reason." she shrugged. She looked at the time. It was getting late and she had work in the morning, she was going to be working extra hours to afford the house she wanted. Which she was highly excited about. She stood up out of the chair. "Um..I have to go; I've got work in the morning. But, I'm glad you're okay." She kissed his forehead. "Bye."

"See you later." Then she was alone again. The air grew cold as she walked down the hall. It was like a monster of isolation when she wasn't around warm energy, a ghost of her past haunting her wherever she goes because she's too embarrassed to accept it. Now that Finn was in a relationship and busy, Rey had no one to help her with nor talk to about this - issue. There was no one she could think of, who wouldn't judge her or - berate her telling her to let it go. Wait, maybe there was someone that could help. Rey checked the time, it was around 7:30. It couldn't be closed by now, she called a cab and made her way to the place where Finn and her had their session. Thinking that Dr. J could help her. She barged into her room, interrupting her session. Something was wrong, Dr. J wasn't in there. It must've been the wrong room. Rey ran down the hall and peaked through one of the doors to see her sitting at a desk writing on paper. This time, she knocked before walking in. She sat on the chair across from her. 

"Rey? What're you doing here?"

"I need some therapy." she admitted shamefully. 

"Oh? Is something wrong with you and Finn-"

"No, it's not about me and Finn. It's just me."

"Well, Rey I am a _couples_ therapist." she reminded.

"I get that, but I only trust you." 

Dr. J stared at her tapping her pen against her lips. Debating, she looked Rey up and down studying her. It made Rey shift uncomfortably, it took her a long time before she said anything. "Okay." she finally said folding her hands out in front of her. "What's up?"

Rey sighed and let it all out, starting with her childhood. Being in the custody of a man who neglected her, leaving her to raise herself. She never knew her parent's and always dreamed of what they could have been, based on what she saw from families in public. But seeing those families hurt her, turning her into a something that wasn't human. She grew emotionless, and it was - terrible. Eventually, she lost hope in having a family or finding one. She focused on herself and her survival because that's all that mattered at the time. There was no reason, until she met Finn. He pulled her out of her hole bringing her into a world she had only dreamed about as a child. He was just like her, no family, neglected, but unlike her he never fell. Nothing was there to pull him up, yet he managed to hold himself. That fascinated Rey, she never felt that way towards anyone or anything. Finn was special. He taught her many things, but most importantly, he taught her love. He knew a way with words with little confident in them, he knew how to make her smile and he made he gave her reason. They were two peas in a pod, inseparable it seemed. Those were..the happiest times of Rey's life. But, then they got together and she was even happier. The happier she grew, the sadder she became afraid, afraid of losing him, just like her parent's so long ago. So she left him, and as he faded away the isolation came back. And once again she was trapped, alone, in the dark. Dr. J studied her carefully, taking in every word she was saying. Rey looked at her.

"What should I do?" she asked.

"Hm..it seems that you are still suffering from the traumatic experiences of your childhood. You are insulated. Picture this: you, the box are stuffed with all these emotions and fears that just keep filling you up inside and you won't let it out. Why?"

Rey turned her gaze to the ground. "I - I don't know."

"But, you _do_ know Rey. I can tell you haven't really had the time to really focus on _you_."

"What're you talking about? I'm always by myself, thinking to myself."

"That's not what I mean and you know it. You haven't looked within yourself, to see what you're truly capable of." she sat back in her seat. "You've been holding back. Why is that?"

"Do you wanna know the truth?" Rey asked sighing in frustration.

"I would like to, yes." she nodded. Rey admitted to her eviction. Dr. J lowered her head in sympathy. "I'm sorry about _all_ of that. But do you really think leaving the area is the best option?"

"It's my only option. I can't shack up with anyone, everyone has a life."

"Think about what your doing first alright?" she packed up her things. "That's all we have for tonight."

"Oh, okay," Rey stood up and dug through her purse. "how much should I give you?"

"No charge." she said holding her hand out. She shook her hand giving her a card. It had all her info on it. "Call me if you need anything okay?"

"Thank you." she smiled. Rey made her way to her car feeling nauseous, her mind took no time to accuse her of being pregnant. But, that was impossible she hasn't had any sex in like three weeks. But her stomach was in a lot of pain, so she walked to the local pharmacy and picked a bunch of antibiotics because once Rey was sick she was sick for a _long_ time. And this tiny cold was already taken it's turn on her. She prayed it wasn't the flu, she hasn't got her shots in about eight years. She drove home feeling exhausted and ready for bed. As she stripped off her party clothes she fell on the bed face first knocking herself out. But she was interrupted by her phone ringing. There was no caller id. She answered it holding the phone to her ear.

"Hello?"

"Hi, this is Lando Calrissian, I got your message that you wanted to see the townhouse in Cora?"

"Yes, I do." she sat up. 

"The appointment is set to be tomorrow at 10:30 in the afternoon, where you'll get a tour of the house to see if you like it. Can I get your name?"

"Okay. Rey Tore." she nodded."

"Thanks, nice doing business with you."

"You too!" she hung up and threw herself back on the bed, feeling excited about seeing the house. She pictured it in her head what it might look like, wonderful. The next morning Rey work up early, too early. She wasn't sure how long the ride would be to get there, the GPS said an hour but GPS's tend to give false information or take you the long way. She took a hot shower getting out all the phlegm in her throat and snot in her nose. The house was cold, the heater was broke and summer was over. Rey sat on the couch eating a bowl of cereal, she looked at her apartment, all the furniture and clothes and books all over the place. She would miss this place, but not too much. There wasn't much going on in that apartment other than the hilarious arguments her neighbors would have through the walls. Rey watched the time on her phone strike nine fifteen. It was best to leave now. She put her shoes on and made her way to the door. Opening it to see Finn with his fist up to knock. 

"Oh hey." he smiled. "I was just about to knock."

They stared at each other for a second. "What's up?" Rey asked.

"I was just returning your clothes from yesterday," he handed her a paper bag full of clothes. "Rose was too busy to do it."

"Thank you." she put the bag inside then walked into the hall closing and locking the door behind her. She could feel Finn's eyes watching her. 

"Where're you heading?"

"Work." she said, not looking at him. She pressed the elevator button.

"Really? You're uh..not wearing your uniform."

"Oh." she walked into the elevator. Finn followed her, his hands in his pockets. Rey looked through her purse making sure she had everything she needed. The doors closed and they watched as the floor numbers went down. 

"Rey, is everything okay?"

She looked at him. "Mhm." she hummed. 

"You sure?" he faced her. "I feel like there's something going on, something you don't want to tell me about."

"Why would you think that?"

"Last night you were talking about something I was planning that I didn't know I was planning, now your being suspicious sneaking around."

"Finn, I don't have to tell you everything, you know."

"I know.” He nodded.

”So, why is this conversation happening?” She looked away from him. Feeling the look on his face, she knew what was coming next.

”Are you mad at me?” 

Rey didn’t know how to answer that, was she? They were best friends and he refused to tell her about what he was planning for Rose. He wasn’t telling her anything so why should she?  Was he not telling her because of what they used to be? Was he afraid she wasn’t over him because of what happened weeks before? Why was everyone so concerned with her about this? She whipped at him giving him a terrifying glare.

”If it’s about last night I - I was serious, there was nothing I have planned. I would’ve told you if I did.” 

“Finn..” she looked at the ground, upset at what she was about to say. “there was a time we told each other everything.” She looked up at him. “Why can’t you just tell me?” 

“Tell you what Rey? I’m so confused!” He chuckled shrugging his shoulders. The elevator doors opened.

“Just forget it Finn and don’t worry about where I’m going.” Before she walked out she stopped herself, thinking maybe she was being ridiculous. Finn didn’t want to tell her, that’s was his choice, and it wasn’t her business frankly. There was no point in arguing. She sighed turning around to see him. “I’m sorry, I-“

”It’s been a rough week I know, you told me.” He said sympathetically. Rey stared at him, her eyes filling with tears. She’s been trying so hard to be strong but she couldn’t hold it in anymore. There was too much going on and she was just too stressed. Her face burned red as a tear ran down her cheek and she exhaled hard. Staring at Finn the whole time she watched as he grew more and more solicitous of her. He held out his arms and she fell into them, feeling grateful of his solace. She dug her nose in his shoulder smelling his sweet natural scent while clutching his back. They stood there for a long time as he rocked them back side to side, feeling safe in each other’s arms. Finn caressed her hair and kissed her cheek making both of their hearts jump. Then Rey remembered she has an appointment that she should have been driving to by now. She let go of him holding the strap of her purse over the opposite shoulder. She wiped a tear off her cheek.

”I have to go.” She sniffled turning around to leave without saying anything else. She got in her car and drove all the way out of town for an hour until she finally arrived to Cora. It was a really nice town, with children playing at the local park, people smiling walking their dogs, and old ladies being helped cross the street. The town seemed peaceful, no violence or loud noises that cause disruption to others. She drove into the townhouse neighborhood which was so surreal looking. All the houses were well taken care of with perfectly cut grass out in the front with hydrated flowers dancing in the wind. Teens riding their bikes and playing basketball in their driveways. Men washing their cars and woman leaving for work. It was like your perfect, cheap, affordable suburban neighborhood. Rey parked in front of house twenty-seven where a man stood by the steps. She got out of the car and followed him around the house, feeling really good about the neighborhood being safe and the swell appearance she decided to move in. 


	5. Breaking Ties

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> To make things easier, Rey let's Finn go once again in her last days in town.

Rey sat there signing the lease for the townhouse. She felt good about the new life she was going to perceive, not thinking at all about who she was leaving behind. She finished signing and handed it to Lando who thanked her for consideration. She would be getting the keys by tomorrow and the rest is up to her. She had a lot to move, although there was much more to get rid of. It would be the perfect time for her to go through all she had and figure out what she needed and what she didn’t. While driving home Rey listened to music loud in the car. It was time for her to celebrate, and she was going to do very much that. After arriving back home she pulled out a bottle of wine, she didn’t bother to grab a glass. She pulled out some boxes she stuffed in her closet long ago, they were cold and dusty. Rey prayed there wasn’t any spiders inside, she hated spiders and this house was full of it. Luckily she won’t have to deal with it in her new home. She popped the bottle open and chugged it down before looking through the box. It was filled with old CD's and reminder notes that she had forgotten about. She pulled out a pink lingerie and laughed at how ridiculous it looked. It was a funny night when she wore it, Finn made fun of it and so did she. Rey didn’t know why she bought it it was a bad idea trying to be sexy in that, no one could look sexy in that. But it was a good memory to look back on. She questioned why she kept it after that night, then remembered that Finn swore he was going to wear it as a joke. But Rey took it seriously as a joke. Maybe she should keep it, just for a reminder of that night. She folded it placing it to the side, most of the other stuff in the box was junk. Bracelets from clubs and receipts for stupid shit she bought in case she wanted to return it. Rey gasped and covered her mouth seeing something she hasn’t seen in years. She picked up the letter with wet eyes, feeling a lump in her throat she read it:

_When you beam, I shine even in the dark of the night. You’re the peanut and I’m the butter in the sandwich that makes my heart flutter. When you look away I look at you, proud that you exist. We both found family in each other and I want to make it official, be mine?_

Tears ran down her cheeks, she turned to the other side of the paper seeing the black and white selfie they took the day they got together. Rey’s duck face winking at the camera as Finn kissed her cheek trying to hide his smile. That was the best day of her life. What happened? She took a picture of it and sent it to him.

”Remember this?” Her text said under the photo. She watched as the three bubbles appeared.

”Woww where’d you find that?”

”In one of the boxes in my closet. I found the lingerie too lol.”

He sent her the crying laughing emoji. “What a night that was I remember we laughed for almost an hour.”

”Yeah.” She sent back. 

“Your okay?” Rey stared at the text. Finn really knew her well.

”I’m fine.” She sent, then stood up and headed to the local depot to get some more boxes. As she drove to town her phone vibrated, Finn was calling. She picked up the phone. ”What’s up?”

”Hey, you busy?” 

“A little, why?”

”Want to get some dinner?”

“Um..” Rey thought for a second. She was hungry, but she had a lot of stuff to do. “Sure.” She blurted. Not meaning to say that. Why did she agree?

“Okay, see you at Vinnys in thirty.”

Thirty? ”Yeah, Okay.” That wasn’t enough time to get much done. But it was too late to back out. She shopped for boxes of all sizes then went home and packed up a bit. She knew she wasn’t going to take her couch or her mattress. Maybe the TV could stay, but she had to do the math on how much she would be spending on _new_ furniture. This was all too complicated to do on her own. She needed help. 

They both arrived at Vinnys at the same time. They sat at the assigned booth, sitting across from each other. Rey looked at his finger, still patched up. Man sometimes he does the dumbest things. But, then again, Rey could say just the same about herself. She was sure that Finn wanted to talk to her about something because of the poker face he was making looking at the menu. Something he did when he needed to think about something deep. He sucked his teeth and rolled his eyes annoyed at his thoughts. This terrified Rey, she had no idea what he was going to tell her it could be anything good or bad. 

“Finn, what’d you call me here for?” 

He looked up at her, with an anxious look in his eye. Like he was afraid to say what he wanted to. “You kept that letter all this time?” He asked finally, but that wasn’t what he wanted to say. Rey could tell.

“It’s a good memory to look back on.” She shrugged nonchalantly. “That’s all.” 

“Okay..” He let it go. “I know it wasn’t a - hasn’t been a good week, but are you okay now?”

”Is this seriously what you called me here for? Finn I told you I’m fine.” 

“Whenever you say your fine you aren’t, I’m asking as a friend if you are. I’m worried for you Rey.”

”Why? I’m not doing anything wrong, I’ve just had a rough week.” Her voice went softer with every word. “I haven’t done anything to make anyone concerned.”

”So you’re saying your fine? That why you were crying earlier? For nothing but attention?”

”No-“

”Then tell me Rey, I want to help you.”

She looked up at him sharply. “Don’t you have a girlfriend to worry about? I’m the least of your concern right now.”

”What’re you talking about Rose and I are fine.”

”Exactly, you _are_ fine.” She leaned back a little noticing she was nearly leaning over the table. “So keep it that way. Worrying about me won't help you do that."

”Did she say something to you?”

”She didn’t have to.” She sat back and crossed her arms. "The whole point of our little 'girls night' was for me to find a man to go home with at the end of the night, probably so I'd be too occupied with something else opposed to speaking to you." she lifted her shoulders as a matter of fact.

"I'm sorry Rose did that-"

"No, it's fine. I get it, I'd do the same thing if I were interested in someone who won't leave their ex alone." They stared at each other for a good five minutes. Funny thing about Finn is he never snapped back at her, no matter how snarky or hurtful her comments can get. But he didn't necessarily give it to her either, he always found a way around the argument. At least when they were together, not anymore. It's like there was no point now. As Rey stared she noticed something, it was like deja vu, she was pushing him away again. Just like she did when they broke up. She could tell by the look in his eye he saw it too. 

“Um hello?” The waiter said waving her hands around. They looked up at her. She covered her annoyance with a smile. “What can I get for you today?” 

Rey looked at Finn unsure if she should order at all. She wasn’t in the mood to eat, she just wanted to pack her stuff and go. None of them said anything, so the waiter left saying she'll be back. They stared back at each other, squinting their eyes. Not knowing really what they were waiting for. Finn leaned forward and so did she, turning it into a staring contest. Rey giggled and looked away sitting back down, thinking of what they had done just a few weeks before. How they acted like it never happened, like they weren't bad people. But what they did was bad. She sighed.

"What're we gonna do Finn?"

"What do you mean?"

"With _us_?" she could tell by his expression he was confused. "I know it's been a long time since it happened but..I think we should talk about - that night."

Finn looked at her in a way as to why she would ever want to bring that up again. He folded his hands on the table. "Why?"

"I - well-" she stuttered. "I don't think - that the problems resolved."

"Well, we haven't done it again. I'd say it is." he shrugged.

"That's not what I meant:" she straightened her posture to make herself more clear. "We never really - talked about it. We had _words_ , but it was out of anger and frustration. We were just looking for an apology."

"What're you saying?" 

She looked at him for the first time since staring. "I'm saying, we need to talk about  _that_ night as a _whole_. What we did was no accident, it was a thought through decision, we knew the consequences but did it anyway. Do you get what I'm saying?"

"I - think so?" he tilted his head.

"Finn we slept together because we wanted to." she admitted straight up, just as she said that the waiter arrived and overheard so left them again. Finn looked at the table in disbelief of what she said. He knew it was true, he couldn't deny aloud. "You know it and so do I because I wasn't _that_ intoxicated and you weren't at all. It was our decision." 

"It was.." he said softly. 

"I think Dr. Jones was right..about our unfinished business."

"Well, what do you want me to say Rey? I still have feelings for you? We broke up, what we had is gone. I'm with someone else now, there's no unfinished business." he stated.

"So it's true then, you _have_ moved on..that's why you're going to take the next step with Rose. You just wanted to make sure that all your feelings for me were gone. It didn’t matter to you," she shrugged. “we had the same thing to lose.” she grabbed her purse sliding out of the booth. “Since it’s clear we slept together because of your risky contradictions, you can have dinner by yourself.”

"Rey what're you talking about?" he seethed, getting slightly annoyed with the conversation. 

"I'm saying we're finished Finn." her voice cracked at that. She sighed fixing the strap of her purse onto her shoulder, seeing the sorrow grow in Finn's eyes. "What we had is over, and you don't have to worry about hiding the proposal. I already know about it and it seems like I'm the only one who had to find out on their own." She turned to leave but faced him again after thinking of something else to say. “Which is something I don’t understand, no one told me.” She chuckled raising her shoulders to her ears. “As if telling me would cause all hell to break loose? I didn’t care that you were proposing, I’m okay with it. But the fact that you couldn’t even tell me, your best friend, really - it hurts me Finn.”

"Rey-"

"Save it." she interrupted. "I need to go, I’ve got a lot of stuff to move.” She walked away trying hard to swallow the lump in her throat. She got in her car and drove home. Rey boxed most of everything she needed, she couldn’t pack up much because of her current mood. So she dragged her feet into her bedroom throwing herself on the bed. She dug her face in a pillow wishing things would be different. Wishing she could go back in time and just stop herself from being with Finn because that’s where it all began, with him. And his contagious smile, his laugh and humor. He was something, still was. But their something was finished, it saddened Rey knowing she wouldn’t see him again. This put her in a funk and before she knew it, she was wailing into the pillow.

* * *

Rey packed up the last remaining furniture she was bringing, her muscles soar from pulling things apart. She still had a lot of time on her hands before the moving truck would arrive, so she decided to relive memories. She went into town going to the frozen yogurt restaurant, a place where you can make the yogurt yourself. The concept amazed her, she could put so many different toppings on different flavored yogurts. The experience wasn’t as fun doing it alone though. She usually ate here with Poe and Finn, they had their own little table because of how often they would come together. Finn would always get coconut with banana, and Poe would get plain mango, Rey was the only one who kind of went all out. She would get a little bit of almost every flavor then overwhelm it with all the toppings she could get her hands on. But her favorite was the chocolate fudge one, she made it extraordinary with her gummy toppings and sprinkles and fruits. Finn and Poe would always berate her on it and she would always make fun of their basic yogurt. Those were good times. Now she was here by herself, not really in the mood to go outside the box today, she ordered plain chocolate with no toppings. Rey checked her phone for the first time today, seeing about ten missed calls from Finn and three from Rose. Today was not the day to deal with anyone. She just wanted to get her ice cream and go to some therapy one more time. She stood in line waiting to pay for her yogurt.

"So your just gonna leave us? Just like that?" A voice said, Rey looked next to her to see Poe serving himself with chocolate sprinkles. Fuck, how'd he know? "Jessika told me, y'know cause we're married."

"Oh, so she just chat's about her patients all day?"

"No, you're our friend and technically in a way I'm a therapist too. Being married to one changes a person." he looked at her. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"I didn't tell anyone, but Jessika." 

"Okay, but why? Is it because of Finn?"

Rey gave the cashier her card and sighed. "Yes. I know you would've told him and - I don't want to deal with that right now. I don't want to deal with any of it. I knew you guys would try to make me stay."

"Of course, we don't want you to leave, you're family. But if you think that's best for you then..I respect it."

"Thank you."

"Just - why don't you tell me about the eviction? I could've helped you in court."

"No, the eviction was good. I've been trying to move out of that place since I moved in. I just couldn't find anything affordable." she explained.

"So, you chose a place out of town?"

"Yes, and it's a beautiful townhouse in Cora."

"Cora? That place is nice, good choice." he praised. "I'm sad your going. We're going to miss you." he hugged her tight, something she really needed at the moment. Rey listened to some happy music on the way to Dr. J’s office, she wasn't going to confront her or anything, just to talk. The music didn't make her feel any emotion, and it usually did. She walked into Dr. J’s office and she looked at her surprised.

"Rey, I - wasn't expecting you." She exhaled. Rey helped herself to the seat in front of her desk making no expression at all. They looked at each other. "Is something wrong?"

Rey didn't answer, she just sat there blank. Her sight grew blurry as her eyes wet with tears, still motionless. "I'm..becoming what I used to be.." she stuttered. Her stomach twist and turned like laundry being washed. She wanted to scream, cry, vomit etc. Dr. J reached out her hand on the desk for her to touch. Rey placed her hand in hers and squeezed it. 

"This isn't easy for you I know, but do you know why that is?"

Her gaze fell to the floor. "Because I don't want to leave." she swallowed. 

"Exactly, and - I can't force you out of strong decisions but I can say that you're leaving everything you have behind just because you 'can't afford to live here.'" she quoted. Everything Dr. J had just said went out Rey's other ear. So, she thanked her and returned home. The moving truck was outside waiting, she unlocked her apartment door and let the moving guys do their job as she stood there, drinking the small amount of vodka left in the bottle. She stuck her headphones in her ears and turned her music all the way up as she slid to the floor. More getting lost in her mind than the music, Rey closed her eyes and thought about everything that's happened this past month. She fucking had sex with her ex boyfriend who was in a relationship with the girl who used to be his friend while they were dating. Rey was literally dating a drug dealer because that's all she could turn to without Finn helping her guide the way. She practically ruined their friendship with Poe after fighting over dinner, then they were friends again. It wasn't the same, but it was something. They weren't together, but they were something. That didn't hide the secret tension between them, that cold space that they never acknowledged. Why? And why was Rey thinking over a guy? Maybe because he was all she needed, all she had, and now he was gone taking her heart with him. He didn't break it, she did. It was her fault that they weren't together, her choice and it fucking sucked. Fuck! She slapped the floor in frustration. She loved him, Rey loved Finn. The girl who didn't even know what love was until she saw his eyes. Those sweet dopey eyes. She wanted him, she craved him. She'd give anything to get him back. Rey fucked up, she knows that now. She just wishes she never went to his house that night. Feeling the heavy steps of boots she opened her eyes to see a mover guy in front of her. She took out her headphones.

"Sorry to interrupt your..everything's packed." he informed. _Already?_ Rey thought. It felt like she was sitting there for five minutes. It might have actually been five minutes. There wasn't much stuff to move. "We'll follow your car?" 

"Um..yeah, thank you." She stood up and went downstairs to her car. She looked up at her apartment building, remembering the walks, the robberies, the sex. Hesitantly, she started the engine and drove to Cora. Her new home. The ride was silent, she didn't turn on any music. The only sound was the cold wind hitting her ear from the window being down. The side of her face might have been numb, but she didn't care. It was a perfect description of how she was feeling. She shouldn't have gotten attached to anyone, but of course she did. Now she was numb. She pulled into her driveway, her driveway. Her car was trash compared to everyone else's. She didn't care though. The moving trucked parked behind her as she unlocked the door and walked in. The fresh smell of wood hitting her nose, normally she would have a good feeling. But this time she didn't. The movers barged in with furniture and boxes. For some reason the life Rey had imagined in this house was gone. In fact, she couldn't even think of what she might do in an hour no matter how predictable it was. Her phone rang and it was Finn calling again. She pressed decline and went to the moving truck to help. She reached in for some boxes.

"Uh - ma'am those might be heavy." one of movers cautioned.

Rey looked at him and carried the boxes easily, not even a grunt of pain. She walked into the house bringing them to the second floor. The smell of freshly cleaned carpet scented the rooms. They really took care of this place. It was so comfortable Rey was ready to sleep there and then on the floor. It looked comfortable, and for the first time, she was okay with it. With that, she lied on the fluffy beige carpet facing the door way. It wasn't a bit odd for her to fall asleep with strangers in her house, but she didn't have anything worth stealing. Slowly, the world dimmed and Rey wasn't conscious anymore. 

_Rey cried for her parent's as she was being dragged by a stranger she's only met once. Why were they leaving her? Why couldn't she go with them? The rain was pouring down, the man's grip loosened for a split second and Rey ran after the car in the dark of the night. She ran after it until it reached it's stop light, she approached the door and pulled on it to go inside. Nothing budged, she banged on the window and screamed for them to take her. She loved them, and they..left her. The light turned green and the car drove away. This was Rey's first experience with betrayal, sadly, that's the only experience she needed to make her into the woman she became. Eventually Plutt found her and punished her for her actions by not feeding. She remembered seeing him stuff his face in front of the small television like she wasn't there. Her stomach growled leaving her no choice but to make a deal with the man. She would work for him in return for food and water, he accepted making her find scraps in the junkyard they lived in to sell. It wasn't easy, occasionally some douche bag children would come to steal or destroy shit. This, is what made her become tougher. One day she had to fight a kid off because he kept running his mouth. She turned around to see..Finn. It was - the day they met, Rey could tell because his hair wasn't in twist. He was standing there waiting for the bus, his headphones in his ears looking up into nothingness._

_"Finn?" He looked at her and took off his earphones._

_"Hey." he smiled, stuffing the wire in his coat pocket. "Thanks for breaking up with me really, it really showed me what I was missing out on."_

_"Daddy!" a little girl said running into his arms. He rubbed her little bag with a big grin. They looked at her, thankfully. "Thank you Rey." the little girl cheesed. The girl resembled of someone else who wasn't her. Rey felt teased, seeing this. Why was she seeing it? It gave her an uncomfortable feeling in her stomach knowing that Finn would be moving forward in his life while Rey was still trying to put hers together. A car pulled and the little girl called out for her mother while going inside. Finn followed her giving Rey a wink just before he went in. Then she was somewhere else, cold and dark and lonely. She tried to call out for someone but nothing came out, she couldn't even move. The cold breeze blew against her skin and the blood in her body grew soar and unmovable.  She screamed help at the top of her lungs._

Rey jolted awake feeling a breeze on her arm. She looked up to see the window open, it was dark out. She got up to close it and went downstairs to see no one around. Everyone was gone. Did they tell her they were leaving and she was just too tired to hear? Possibly. She took a deep breath, feeling home. Except, not home. It's that uncomfortable feeling when you've just moved and you aren't used to the place yet. The neighborhood was quiet as opposed to the noisy streets by her old apartment. Usually around this time, she'd be out with friends. Not anymore. Now she was isolated, just like Dr. Jones predicted, she has brought her fears to life with no strings attached. There were still several missed calls from Finn on her phone, there was no reason for her to answer. He had sent some text messages to her too, Rey told herself not to look but of course she checked anyway. 

_7:31 pm_

_Rey we need to talk. In person._

_Why won’t you answer my calls?_

_7:56 pm_

_Can you open your door pls? I’m outside._

_9:12 pm_

_Are you okay? You’ve been MIA_

_11:27 pm_

_Rey no ones heard from you all night I hope your okay wherever_ _you are. Stay safe I love you_.

She exited the conversation and looked at the one text from Rose.

_4:30 pm_

_I told you that’s not why we went clubbing_.

All of those conversations were in the past, she was moving on just like they were. Maybe she should change her number. That was a good idea. A box in the corner of the room caught the corner of her eye. She looked at it. It seemed like every other box in the room. But this one called out to her, she walked toward it and looked inside. Finn’s letter, their photos and love notes they mailed each other. She was cutting Finn out of her life, that was it. The ties were broken. He needed space and time, so Rey gave it to him. That would me the final thing she would gift him. And nothing, not even cute love notes could change her opinion on that matter. She pulled out a blanket and pillow from one of the boxes and placed it on her naked mattress in the living area. She lay there staring at the ceiling, the outside street lights keeping the house from complete darkness. It was a nice home, a good one in fact. Rey was incredibly grateful for the amazing deal she got on it. But, what good was this whole thing with someone to celebrate with? 

Rey knocked on her neighbors door. There was barking coming from the other side. A few moments later a man opened.

”Hi I’m - James?” Rey recognized that strong acsense of cologne anywhere. He had a toothbrush in his mouth.

”Hey girl from club! You live around here?”

”Actually..yeah. I do.” She nodded, not wanting to tell him too much information.

”Nice, well come in come in.” He opened the door wider, Rey took her time walking in looking around he really spiced up the place. “Don’t worry, Daisy doesn’t bite.” 

Rey looked at the dog and smiled. She always like the name Daisy, she felt a strong connection with it. The dog sniffed around her as she pet her fur. James came back without a toothbrush and went to where his kitchen was. His house was a slightly different layout than hers with highly expensive decor.

“Want some water or anything?” 

“Um - yeah, thank you.” He poured some water in a mug and they sat at his bar. “So, if you leave _here_. Why were you..”

”At a club in a whole different town? I could almost say the same for you.” He smiled jokingly. But Rey’s vague expression made him go more serious. “I own the club.” He admitted clearing his throat.

”Really? Then why are you-“

”Living in a townhouse? I don’t really like separate houses. I prefer ones together because..well - I like to think of it as a metaphor for us all being connected.” 

Rey nodded, her lips pursed. “That’s one way to look at life.” 

“Yup, a great way too.” He smiled. It was silent, Rey drank the rest of the water in tiny sips. 

“I’ve uh..like what you did with the place.” 

“Thanks. Still looking for the right girl to share it with.”

”Oh - I’m sorry I - was I giving you mixed signals?” 

“No, I wasn’t talking about you necessarily, I was just saying in general.”

Rey’s never felt more awkward. She knew this dude was into her, it wasn’t clear. But it was also clear that she wasn’t looking for anyone. In fact, she told him that already. His good looks wouldn’t change that. He looked embarrassed to be around her, maybe she should leave.

”It’s getting late, I’m gonna go. Thanks for the - water.” 

“Yeah, okay. Sorry I made things awkward.”

”It’s fine.” She sighed of relief as she exited the house back into hers. James reminded her a lot of Finn when they were getting to know each other. He was just as nervous except he had way more confidence. She likes that about him, _a lot._ Or at least - liked. It was an absolute turn on for her it made him good at everything and she means _everything_. Damn, what happened? It hurt to know he would be starting a new life with someone else. A man she had hoped to spend the rest of her life with because he made her feel a way she never knew she could feel. Yet Rey was happy for him, because he was her peanut and peanuts don’t hate each other. She laid on the mattress on the floor thinking of him. Scrolling through each other’s photos on her phone, she clicked on one of the videos. It was Finns birthday, he sat on the couch opening up a gift Rey got for him. He looked at it then at Rey over excitedly.

”No way, no fucking way!”

”Open it peanut.” She cheesed in the other side of the lens.

”Rey you didn’t.” He pulled out what was inside the box. It was a suitcase with a record player inside. Finn always liked off gifts like that.

”Do you like it?” 

“Of course I like it, I love it!” He put it down and walked towards the camera and held her face as he planted kisses all over it. 

“Happy birthday!” She grinned waving at the camera.

"I'm gonna play all my music on here!" he cheered.

"Oh god, maybe this was a bad idea." Rey joked grimacing at the camera. Then the video was over. Why did it have to be over? Rey wanted to know what happened next. She spent the rest of the night looking at old photos, videos and text they had just a year ago when they were together. She giggled at some of the text, they were two funny individuals who liked to send each other ugly selfies. Then, she was asleep. Tomorrow she’d return back to her old town one last time to give her landlord her keys.


	6. Revelation

It’s been a busy day for Rey, most of it being spent trying to hook up everything in her house, going shopping for groceries, and searching for furniture. All of it was exciting, but she was extremely exhausted. There was still so much to get done and they day would be over before she could finish. It was extremely stressful. Rey scrolled through her phone looking for jobs that she might be interested in. She’s been searching for hours, there was nothing that really caught her eye. There was no motivation with any of them. She looked out the window and started to think. She has no money currently because she spent most of it on fast food, there was no internet because the WiFi dude hasn’t hooked it up. This was the most boring experience ever. At least when she moved in Finn she had company. Wait what? Why was Finn suddenly in her thoughts? Now she couldn’t stop thinking of the day they moved in together. Rey kind of slowly moved in without really doing the big stuff. She was always at his place bringing something with her every time she came over. One night she visited Finn with a big bag of clothes and he joked about her staying. Sure enough she did and it was the best decision she’s ever made. They had the best nights ever without Rey having to leave to feed her fish or anything. It was just them. Rey sighed remembering those good times. Then she remembered the bad times..and how she ended up in that dumpy apartment. Shit. Rey forgot to return the keys. She quickly got in her car and drove to her old small city one more time. 

Once she arrived the night sky was dawning and the air was cold. Rey made a huge mistake wearing a thin ass sweater. You live you learn. The vibe seemed different there, everything was faster. Was it always like that? There were more people outside, walking quickly to their destinations not caring who they bumped into. Rey smiled, this was what she was used to. This is what she loved. She parked on the sidewalk in front of her old apartment building. She rushed inside before the cold air could touch her, but it was just as cold inside as it was out. She waited thirty minutes before her landlord arrived to the office to get it. She watched as he took it from her hands as if he was taking away so much more. This was it, she was out. Gone for good.  She took her time making her way out of the office. Treasuring the last moments there, she may have hated that place to bits. But it still held a place in her heart. A special one, not  _too_ special though. She noticed someone standing out by her car and went to see who it was. It was Finn.

She opened the door and walked outside stopping in front of him. She crossed her arms. He stood there leaning against her car, his hands in his pockets. They stared at each other. 

Finn dropped his head and sighed. “I’ve been coming here every night to check on you. Your landlord said you moved..” he looked up at her. Rey turned her gaze to her shoes. “..why didn’t you tell me?” He asked, sounding genuinely hurt. Suddenly, she felt emotion again. The feeling of guilt spread in her stomach making her sick. 

She looked at him hauntingly. ”For _this_ reason.” She explained. “I didn’t want to have to deal with saying goodbye, it’s too upsetting!”  

“So, you were just gonna leave us? Without any context? Rey I thought something serious happened to you!” He coaxed.

”I didn’t mean to worry anyone, I just wanted to leave..everything.” 

“Why? Why leave us Rey? After all we’ve been through?” 

“It’s _because_ of what we’ve been through!” She yelled. “I can’t just sit here and watch you be with Rose I - I can’t. I’m happy for you two believe me, but - I just can’t..” she sighed. 

"You're leaving..because of me?"

"Well - that's not necessarily what I said.." she clarified. "It's not just you guys, everything is expensive here and I kinda..sorta..got evicted." she admitted shamefully, playing with her ear lope. Finn's jaw dropped.

"And you didn't tell me?"

"I didn't tell anyone!"

"Rey we could have helped you, you could've stayed at my place or-"

"No, that's exactly why I left. I feel like I keep getting in between you and Rose, _even_ now."

He stopped leaning on the car and moved closer to her. "You're not getting between anyone. You should've told me..I would've helped you."

"It's too late now." she shrugged.

"No, I'm throwing a party for you."

"Finn I really don't think that's a good idea-"

"I already scheduled it, it's tomorrow night. Please come and wear something spectacular because it's not just any party."

Rey sighed as he moved closer, a foot of space between them. She really wasn't in the mood for partying knowing that there was so much errands to run, but it gave her a chance to see everyone one last time. If everyone was coming. "Is everyone coming?" she asked. He nodded. "..okay, I'll go."

"Pleasure to be in business with you." he held his fist out for a bump and Rey accepted trying not to smile. "See you then," he stepped out of the way gesturing to her car. "your chariot awaits." 

She got in her car and watched him watch her start the car. He wasn't leaving until after she left. Respectable. She waved to him and he waved back just as she drove away. There went that feeling again, cold and lonely. Why did Finn do that to her? He made her feel so alone when he wasn't around, why? It sucked a lot for her, because she was the only one suffering from it. She reached to turn on the heat forgetting that it didn't work because she couldn't afford to fix it. Rey thought of a warm bed to make herself feel better, something else she didn't have at the moment. She didn't really think any of this moving stuff through, it was all last minute. Maybe she didn't have to sleep there tonight, it was late anyway. She pulled into Poe's driveway, seeing a head peak out from the front window where the light was on. It was Bebe, their dog. Rey waved hello as she made her way to the front porch and knocked on the door. She listened to Bebe bark as Jessika approached the door. 

She opened and looked at her confused. "Rey, what brings you here?"

"I - the party..Finn's throwing."

"Oh, yeah, it's gonna be good." she smirked nodded her head.

"I was wondering since I'm already in town, and the drive back and forth is long, could I stay the night?" 

"Yeah, of course." she opened the door wider letting her in. Poe and Jessika had a wonderful suburban house, with lots of room. Just walking through the front door your acquainted by the crystal chandelier just about ten feet above you. Rey wondered if the party was going to be there. All the lights were off except for the living room. Jessika was a few inches taller than Rey, but it always felt like she was towering over her. It was hard for Poe who was a short man himself, it's funny because Jess always make fun of him for it. "Um - Poe is sleeping but make yourself comfortable, you know where the guest room is."

"Yeah." she nodded taking off her shoes. Bebe attempted to jump on her, she was a big dog so it wouldn't end well if she did. Rey grabbed her paws and crouched down to her level. "Hi girl!" she said in her doggy voice. Bebe licked her face, no that Rey wasn't into very much. She wiped off her face and looked over to Jessika in the living room. She was sitting on the couch watching TV. Rey joined her, she wasn't ready for bed yet. It was good to sit on a soft cushioned seat after lying on a cheap mattress for months. Jessika smiled at her then turned her attention back to the television. She was watching some wife show - there were too many to know exactly which. Rey thought about what she said earlier about the party going to be good, and how Finn said it was just any party. She turned toward her for more info without asking for it. Jessika sighed, she knew Rey enough to know her tricks. Plus she was a therapist, she was good at reading people. 

"I'm not telling you about the party, you'll see tomorrow."

"The party is literally-" she checked the time on her phone: 10:28 p.m. "twenty-four hours from now."

"Like I said, tomorrow." she repeated. 

She leaned her head on her fist and sighed. "Can you at least tell me what _kind_ of party it is, so I know what to expect?"

"I can tell you there's gonna be music and food like you know any party would have."

"Funny how you can keep a secret for Finn but not me." Rey jested. Jessika looked at her from the corner of her eye and shifted uncomfortably. 

"I only told Poe and that was out of concern, completely different from our current situation." 

"Why does it matter if I know?"

She looked down at her. "Because it'll ruin the surprise." she turned her body toward her. "We all did, but Finn has really taken most of time and money to make this farewell party for you and I can promise you that you'll be so happy you'll cry when you see it put together." 

Rey gave her a hesitant look, unsure if she was exaggerating it or not. She was a good actor if she was. Rey decided to just play along "Okay, _Dr. J_." They laughed. 

She looked at what she was watching. There was a lot of drama on it, too much for Rey to comprehend. She decided to go sleep in the guest room, a room she hasn’t been in for a long time. The last time she was in there was with Finn, they didn’t get any sleep that night and that wasn’t a bad thing. Poe forced them to replace the sheets even though they weren’t doing anything that serious. It was still funny thinking about it to this day. She opened the door to the bedroom, a draft hitting her almost immediately. It was cold and the sheets were cold. Rey took off her clothes leaving her in a t-shirt and underwear, she got under the thick blanket covering herself completely. Soon it grew hotter from her body warmth, she didn’t mind hot. She grew up in the heat of car grease and oils at the junkyard. Heat was nice.

* * *

Rey opened her eyes, blinded by the sun. She sat up and looked around wondering where she was. Then she remembered. She wasn't in her house, she was in Poe's. There was a party tonight, for her. She put her clothes on, the smell of bacon and eggs filling her nose and she allowed herself to follow it into the kitchen. There stood Poe cooking an omelet listening to Hispanic music. He turned around to look at her and smiled. Jessika came through the back door wearing spandex and a tight long sleeve shirt, she must've came from a run. She went into the fridge and pulled out a bottle of water.

"Morning Rey." they smiled. Jessika grabbed the plate the omelet was sitting on and went to the table. "Rey would you like an omelet?"

"Of course. Thank you." she joined Jess at the table. Watching her scroll through her phone with one hand while eating with the other. As much as Rey didn't want to, she had nothing to wear for tonight and didn't know what to wear either. She knew Jess would be willing to help. "Hey, can you...help me find a dress for tonight?" 

She stopped looking at her phone, her eyes rising to see her face before beaming with a smile. "Hell yeah I can!" she smiled. "We'll go right now!" she grabbed her wrist and pulled her towards the front door. 

"What about my omelet?" Rey yelled, but it was too late. Jessika was already starting the car chatting away about how excited she was. Rey didn't even have her wallet on her. She listened to Jessika talk the whole way to the galleria. They spent hours going to expensive dress stores that had gowns that were too fancy and thought they were beautiful, they were out of Rey's budget. But of course it was in Jessika's budget. She liked shopping and she had the money for it.

"Don't worry Rey, this is my treat to you!" She said on the other side of the dressing room door as Rey tried on one of the dresses.

"I don't know.." she began. "These dresses are so fancy. It seems like we're going a too far."

"Rey, this party is for you. There's no such thing as going too far." Rey stepped out of the dressing room revealing a silk backless purple ball gown, with a long sleeve fabric front. Jessika's eyes widened as she covered her mouth. "You look beautiful." she gushed. Rey turned around to see her reflection and smiled. She's never seen herself look like this before, she looked astonishing. She turned to back to Jess.

"This is too much I - I can't wear this."

Jessika grabbed her hands. "Yes, you can." she looked at the dress. "And you will. We're getting this one!" 

They paid for it and went back to the house. Rey assumed Jessika had already got her dress since they didn't get anything else. Entering back into the house talking away, Poe was in the living room eating some ice cream. Bebe on his lap licking from his bowl. He waved at them as they came in. 

“Girls have fun?” 

“Definitely!” Jessika sang holding the bag of stuff. She pulled Rey upstairs to her room closet. It was big with cubbies of clothes, shoes, and jewelry for all occasions. You could say she was prepared for anything. There was a big mirror between the windows at the end of the closet to see your final look. Jessika placed the dress carefully on the counter in the center of the room.

”Let’s spice her up shall we?” She smirked.

”Go right ahead.” Rey said giving her permission. She wasn’t very good at picking shoes and jewelery for anything other than staying home or going clubbing. But nothing for whatever tonight’s party was. It made her anxious not knowing what she was getting into, and no one would tell her. Jessika scrambled around the room like a fly looking for the right things for the dress as Rey watched. She checked her phone to see the time noticing a message from Finn. He was checking in to make sure she was going. She sent him a picture of Jessika holding up a necklace with the caption “no going back now.” He sent back an excited emoji almost right away. 

“Rey, come here for a sec.” she did as told and went up to her. She held earrings by her ears and squinted her eyes, her face serious. She moved the earrings. “Okay.” 

“Is all this jewelry necessary?”

”You’re right, no jewelry. The look is good all by itself, just shoes. Um - Rey you can pick the shoes. This is _your_ look after all.” She featured toward the cubbies of heels. Each heel glimmering in the closets light. Rey picked the only one that would match the dress - or gown, the matte lilac heel. It was cute and basic, she wasn’t feeling it. She gave it to Jessika. “I would’ve went with the Versace but - okay.” She avowed.

”What about your look?” Rey asked.

She looked at her as, grateful she asked.. “My look? Do you want to see it?” 

“Yeah, show me watchu got!”

”Okay!” She walked through the door at the end of the room. “Poe and I are going to be matching with some green..” she walked out carrying a hanger with a dress draped in plastic. “It’s mermaid silk - _with_ jewelry. You know, not to... _outshine_ you or anything.” She joked. Rey looked under to see the look when Jessika stopped her. “You will see it tonight.” She went to put it back into the room that turned it to just be a bathroom. Rey started to get a funny feeling in her stomach.

”I need Dr. J.” She sighed sinking to the floor. Jessika cleared her throat getting into character. She sat beside her.

”What’s up?” 

“This can’t all be for me can it? It seems like it’s too much and you _know_ I can’t handle too much.”

”Well, if you want the truth. It’s not necessarily for you..” she pitched highly. “It’s more like this charity event thing that Poe and Finn have been working on..and Finn thought it would be nice, after finding out you were leaving, to gift it to you. And he only jazzed it up for you, the charity wasn’t even a big deal until he put your name on it.”

Rey’s brows met. “What do you mean put my name on it?” 

She covered her mouth and closed her eyes, regretting what had come out of her mouth it seemed. “Fuck, I’ve said to much. Help me God.” She ran out of the closet before Rey could bombard her with anymore questions. Rey decided to keep what she said a secret for know, maybe to scream at Finn later perhaps. 

Soon nightfall came, and everyone was preparing for the event. Poe spent two hours in the shower and so did Jessika. By the time Rey got in, there was barely enough hot water. But she got through it. Since the party was mostly for her, she put on her favorite underwear to treat herself. Because that’s what she did to prize herself, not throw a major charity party. She put the dress on delicately, trying not to rip it. Now that it was on, she wouldn’t be able to put anything on without being afraid of staining the dress. Which sucked because she was hungry and didn’t get to eat her omelet which she was still mad about by the way. There was no going back now, she put half of her hair up and put Jessika’s heels on. She was ready, but was she ready? Poe knocked on the door.

”You look smokin’ girl!” He jeered. “You ready?”

Rey looked down and nodded softly. “Yeah.” She followed him to the front of the house. Jessika was waking down the stairs, her hair in a bun, jewelery everywhere, and a purse in her hand. 

“Woo wee!” Poe exclaimed holding his hand out to her. She grabbed it and together they went to the car, Rey railing behind them like the third wheel she was. It was a beautiful night, the stars gleaming down at them. Rey didn’t say much during the ride, there wasn’t much to say. For the first time, she felt extremely nervous. Her palms were sweaty and everything, she gulped as they pulled up to the building. Her heart pounding out of her chest, she didn’t want to get out of the car. She didn’t want to see Finn or anyone. She wanted to go home. Poe opened the door and she stared at it then at him, he was smiling. Clearly excited to go in. 

“You guys go ahead I’ll - I’ll be here..” her voice trailing off.

”Hey, don’t worry.” Poe soothed.

”We’ll be with you the whole way.” Jessika promised. Rey looked at both of them, they were kind of like parents on the first day of school. It kind of made her feel better, she loved their fake family. Rey took a deep breath and followed them to the front doors. Music blasting from the other side, she wanted to run away and hide forever. Maybe she could fake her death or something, anything to get out of this situation. Jessika grabbed her hand and so did Poe. 

“Tonight’s gonna be great. We promise.” She said softly. Rey nodded, trusting them. They were trustworthy, maybe Rey was overreacting. The doors opened and they walked in. People everywhere, dressed really nice, soft music playing in the background as people helped themselves to the buffet. The whole event looked expensive, Finn did all of this for her? Why? She looked around for him, her heart thumping at his sight. He was talking to a couple. Next thing Rey new she was being pulled towards him by Poe and Jessika. They hugged him and smiled, Rey stayed back a bit hiding behind them. Finn looked at her, his eyes sparkling. 

“You..look stunning.” He gassed approaching her. Rey found herself blushing. He pulled her into a warm hug, she was cold and his body warmth against hers was nice. Poe and Jessika were suddenly at the buffet making themselves plates. They let go and looked at each other. Then Rey hit his arm.

”Why did you do this for me!?”

”I was trying to do something nice for you, since - we’ll never see each other again.” 

She forgot about that. “This is really overwhelming, all this for me?” 

“Basically, I’m also running a charity event but the basis is for you. You know we haven’t had the best year together and I wanted to change that before you go.”

”By throwing me a party?”

”You _like_ parties.”

”I do.” She shook her head and crossed her arms.

”So,” he put her arm in his. “let’s party.” They walked to the DJ and Finn whispered something into her ear. She nodded and the music stopped. Everyone looked at them, then 50 Cent’s I Get Money came on and the lights turned into disco lights. Everyone went from elegance to untamed. They went to the dance floor dancing around like monkeys. Rey laughed at Finn’s boogie, he shimmied his shoulders at her. She couldn’t dance to much not with this dress, she was planning on returning it and paying Jessika back. Looking to her left she saw Maz dropping it like it was hot in the middle of a small dance circle. That little woman works wonders. So far Rey was having a good time. She went to the bar to get some drinks, but being careful this time. She wasn’t trying to get drunk tonight, not with Finn. As the bartender pour her drink she noticed the bar, covered in food with a shrimp fountain and chicken and lobster and so much more. She swallowed the drool, grabbed her drink and now made her way over. Forgetting about the dress, she made two full plates of food and dogged it down as everyone danced. As Rey found herself getting a little tipsy she became upset knowing that once the night was over, she’d go home where no one was. No friends, no family, no happiness. If only she could move back. 

Finn joined her, his face glossy from sweat and his blazer off. He took a chicken from her plate and bit into it looking at her. She rested her chin on her fist and gazed back, batting her eyes. They didn’t talk, they didn’t need to. He raised his eyebrows as if to ask if she was having a good time. She nodded. She loved their telepathic conversations. He held his hand out to her.

”Let me show you something!” He shouted over the music. She grabbed his hand.

”Okay.” She said softly. He grabbed his blazer and they went up a stairway that lead to the roof patio. A couple of people were up there chilling. Finn threw the chicken, that was no just bone, in the trash. He walked towards the balcony, Rey followed him seeing the view of the city. It took her breath away, she never realized how beautiful this place was until she was leaving.

”I like it up here.” He admitted. “It’s nice.”

”It is.” She added. “I like it too.” She could see him staring at her from the corner of her eye. It put a weird feeling in her stomach, a feeling she hasn’t felt since the day they met. He looked back at the landscape, his hand brushing against hers as he scooted a little closer. Their body heat keeping each other warm. She missed them and their concept. It was good, tough lost. They stayed like that for what felt like a few minutes maybe seconds. But when Rey turned around to see everyone else they were gone, with no trace of them being there at all. She didn’t even hear them leave. 

“Holy shit.” Finn swore checking his phone.

Rey looked at him concerned. ”What?” 

“It’s 2:47.”

”Really?” That was too fast to be true.

“No.” He smiled. She hit him lightly. “It’s 12:15.” He looked back to the night sky.

”Maybe we should go inside.” She suggested hugging herself. Finn looked at her noticing her shiver and gave her his blazer before they walked in taking there time down the stairs as they talked the night away. 

“You had _no_ game.” Rey laughed clutching his blazer that hung at her shoulders.

”What? No I had game, still do. I just like to save my game you know. The more I save it the more I have to give.”

”Finn you literally don’t have any, I’m not kidding!” She chuckled. 

“Then how’d we ever get together? Huh?”

”I liked you _a_ _lot_.” She said softly, kicking her feet around. 

“It was my charm.” He whispered. “And I remember the exact words that got you.” He continued his way down the stairs. 

”Oh really? What was it then?”

Finn stopped and thought for a second. “‘You gonna eat that?’” 

Rey laughed. “Is that really what you think?”

”I’m gonna be honest - I’m not sure what made you fall for me. I say some shitty stuff all the time.”

”That's not true, your the sweetest individual I’ve ever met. And it’s not necessarily something you said that made me fall for you. It’s what you did.” 

“What’d I do?” He asked, they sat on the cold concrete stairs. A part of Rey was grateful she wore a long dress so her bottom wouldn’t freeze sitting on it. 

“Well,” she started rubbing her hands together for heat. “It was the way you..” she looked at him and bit her lip. Unsure to admit it, would telling him put her in between again? She shook her head. “..you were always there, to make sure I was okay. You checked on me so much I thought you had nothing better to do.” She chuckled. “You were the only person who did that and - I wasn’t really sure if you felt the same way, hell I wasn’t even sure about how I felt. I’ve never felt that way towards anyone before and it wasn’t something I could get used to. But seeing you..I just went mad, I didn’t show it but boy I was craving you.” They laughed. Rey was trembling. “You know the rest.” He squeezed her hand, she didn’t even notice they were holding each other’s hands, she was so caught up in the moment. Finn leaned closer and it felt like a million tiny little balls were bouncing around in her stomach.

”Told you I had game.” He smirked leaning back.

“That’s not game, that’s compassion!”

”My game is compassion, you know it. I bet I can sweep you off your feet right now, just like I’ve been doing since day one.”

He was already swooning her without doing anything, his whole presence shot her through the roof. “Oh really, are you sure _I_ haven’t been sweeping _you_ off your feet?” He froze. Rey knew she got him, she was always making him blush. 

“Uh - Rey, come on don’t throw me under the bus like that.” He stuttered. He was so cute when he was flustered. They gazed at each other for a while. "How's the party?"

"It just keeps getting better. It seems." she sunk into her shoulders, turtle style, blushing. Finn rubbed her arm and pulled her into his chest for a brief moment. There was always a light in his eyes when he smiled at her, no one else. It seemed like she was in a fantasy, like the world didn't exist. It was her and Finn alone and nothing else mattered, he was right there beside her like he always was and she wanted it to stay that way. He was looking at her silly. 

"Why're you looking at me like that-" His lips clashed with hers, Rey kissed back then pulled away holding his chest to keep him from leaning back in. "Finn, we can't. I'm sorry." She ran down the stairs, Finn calling her name from behind. As sorry as she was, she was proud for stopping herself unlike the other times. But Finn was going to be a married man, and she promised she wouldn't get in between. She ran through the ballroom where everyone was. No one was there, was the party over? How long were they on the stairs? It seemed like she was ditched by Jessika and Poe. She checked her phone for text from them. Poe texted her saying that they were ready to leave and waiting for her, then to ask Finn for a ride home after she didn't reply for ten minutes. Jessika texted saying to return her shoes, classic Jess. Not wanting to leave with Finn after what just happened, Rey decided to call a Lyft. She heard footsteps behind her and turned to see Finn stopping in his tracks. She sighed.

"Finn, please, I just - want to go home." she held the phone by her ear. Finn walked up to her and took the phone out of her hand pressing decline. "What the fuck!?"

He stuffed it in his pocket. "Just _listen_." he clipped. A wrinkle formed between his brows as his face dimmed. "I'm not over you Rey, I never was."

"Finn don't-"

"Let me finish." he interrupted. "When you broke up with me I was..in shock. I thought thing's were going so well between us, I would asked myself constantly what went wrong. Or if it was something else - I wasn't sure. I was hurt for a long time and Rose was there with me almost the whole time and eventually we..." they both looked away from each other. "..I hated myself for it. I didn't want it to happen, and I was pissed it did."

"Sounds familiar." she taunted rolling her eyes. 

"What I'm trying to say is..I never stopped thinking about you. I was with Rose and I didn't want to be, I'm still not sure how it happened I - guess I was mad..it meant nothing. It wasn't like being with you, I never loved her."

"I don't believe that one bit. It doesn't change the fact that you were going to propose." She walked toward the exit, trying to get out before he could say anything else.

"The ring was for you!" he shouted. She stopped, hearing him run closer to her. What did he just say? "The ring was for you." he repeated slightly out of breath. Rey's heart was beating so fast she felt like she was going to pass out. Slowly, she turned to look at him. Her eyes wet as she blinked softly. 

"..what?" She breathed.

"Thing's were going good between us, and we were together for a while. We know practically everything about each other, our flaws and skills. I knew there was no one else out there for me so I bought it, we broke up before I could say anything. I put it one of the boxes I had with our stuff from when we were together. Rose found it and assumed it was for her, she wouldn't stop talking about marriage. Then when you told me about her bringing it up at the dinner, I confronted her and..I told her it was for you. We broke up after that..then I texted and called and you never answered. That's when I found out you were leaving." 

Rey was still hung up on the fact the the ring was for her. Since they were confronting each other she decided to tell him something. "The reason I ended things with you is because we were getting too serious." she shrugged, her sight blurry from tears while her entire face grew warm. "I..was afraid of attachment, since everyone I've ever loved is lost." she looked at him. "I didn't want to lose you too. But when we broke up I was so hurt, I - I couldn't even breathe, my heart ached so much. I wanted you back, but I kept telling myself you wouldn't want me. Then I saw you with Rose and my heart just fell into more pieces. And those night's when we - y'know, I felt alive again. I thought everything would be okay, but it only turned out for the worse in all directions. Now I'm leaving the people I love and-" she paused not being able to finish. "everything I've ever feared is coming true. I'm just back where I started.." 

"You're not." Finn claimed, he cupped her face. "I'm gonna help you, you won't have to go through any of that again. It's all in the past."

"But how're you gonna help? I live so far away.." she sniffled. 

"Then, I guess you're just gonna have to move back in with me." he sighed. "What'd you say or - should I do this the proper way?" He bent down on one knee pulling out a small ring from his pocket. It was beautiful and simple, with one glowing blue crystal in the middle. She couldn't believe what was happening, Rey never thought a day like this would come. But it still didn't feel right.

"Finn I - I can't." 


	7. Just Say Yes

Rey knocked on Poe’s front door feeling incredibly anxious. She was just proposed to by the most amazing man in the entire world and she ran away mortified. She didn’t mean to run away, but she didn’t know what else to do. Rey wanted to spend the rest of her life with Finn she was ready. Or at least, she thought. Finn was all she ever wanted and more, there was no one else she'd say yes to. She loved him to bits, he was her angel. But she just - couldn't say yes, it didn't feel right. Why didn't it feel right? She wanted him, she craved him and now that she could have him, why didn't she get him? Rey hugged herself waiting for someone to answer. It was pretty late, extremely late. They would probably be sleeping. It was freezing cold and Rey hoped that someone would answer soon. All of her belongings were inside. Bebe scratched at the window with her tongue sticking out in the dark house. The door opened, Jessika rubbed her eyes and yawned stopping at her sight. She looked at her with an exhausted expression.

”You gotta stop showing up like this-“

”Finn proposed.” She yelped. Jessika's nostrils flared and her jaw dropped. She looked towards the stairwell.

”POE!” She yelled letting Rey in. It took a couple more yells at his name before he finally came running down the stairs in his robe and slippers. 

"What is it, it's four in the morning-"

"Finn proposed." She blurted.

He stopped and looked at Rey reading her expression. He didn't seem very surprised or shocked about it. They sat in the living room while Poe made some tea for them. Rey explained what happened during the party, petting Bebe on her lap. Poe came over with a tray of cookies giving them each mugs of tea. He sat down and listened. 

"So..you just ran off?" Jessika asked.

"Mhm." Rey nodded sipping her tea. It was hot, steam wetting her skin. She put the cup down. "I didn't know what else to do..I wasn't - prepared for him to do that."

"Well, do you love him?"

"Of course I do. More than anything."

"Then what's holding you back?"

Rey shrugged going for another sip. Poe bit his top lip shifting his eyes from left to right. He seemed real suspicious since Jessika told him about the proposal.

"Poe, do you know something?"

"Huh? No." he chugged the tea burning himself. He swore and looked at the both of them, waiting for an explanation. "Yes..I knew he was going to propose. He told me."

"When?"

"When he was going to do it, the day you broke up with him. You never noticed it because you weren’t looking but..he wasn’t always looking at you and not in that creepy fuck type of way but..it was definitely love. When he came to me that night.." he grabbed a cookie and put it in his mouth. "..he was fucking heart broken."

"I remember that." Jessika commented. "He stayed at our house for weeks and never left the guest room." Rey's heart sank knowing that she'd done that to him. 

"He had this whole day planned on what you guys would do and what he would say to make you smile. He practiced in the mirror a lot, and he planned a perfect moment for the proposal. Honestly it was all really amazing when he told it to me, I was excited. But when the day was over he showed up here without you, in tears. I mean I've never seen Finn in such-" Jessika elbowed him. 

"Finn was excited about tonight, he felt like it was a do-over now that he wasn't with Rose and..he took the chance and asked the question.."

"..and I ran off." 

"Why?" they both asked tilting their heads. It was kind of creepy. "Are you still afraid of losing him?" Jessika asked. 

"I guess..maybe. I don't know." she sighed. Lights reflected through the blinds as they heard a car pull up from outside. Jessika got up to look, she shot Rey a look.

"It's Finn." 

Her heart paced. "I don't want to see him right now."

"You can try to hide in the room but I can't guarantee it'll work, your car is in the driveway."  There was a knock on the door cuing Rey to run to the guest room as Bebe barked at it. She quickly closed the door and hopped into the bed covering her entire body, she realized she was still wearing the dress. It was too late to change out of it. She lied down and closed her eyes to seem like she was sleeping. It was hard to fake it while her chest was heaving after that short run, she wasn't as in shape as she used to be. She heard the door creak open letting the hall light bright up the room. She could see Finn's buff shadow, she wanted to squeeze his biceps.

"Did she tell you what happened?" his voice sent chills down her spine. 

"Uh..no, she just kind of didn't say anything. Said she was tired." Poe explained. 

Finn closed the door leaving her in complete darkness. She could hear him explaining to them what she had told them before he arrived. Rey sat up and looked around. She should be sorry for running off the way she did. He probably thought he scared her off. It wasn't true, she scared herself off with her thoughts and doubts. She pressed her head against the door trying to hear what they were saying. It was faint, but enough to make it out.

"I shouldn't have said anything, it's too late. She doesn't love me anymore." he revealed.

"Of course she does." Jessika cajoled. "She was probably just - scared. I know I was when Poe asked me, I slapped him right in the face." Rey covered her mouth to keep from laughing.

"I can still feel the sting to this day." Poe commented rubbing his cheek. They continued to talk as Rey took off the dress and slipped into the pajamas Jessika lyed out for her. They were incredible soft and warm. She crawled into bed, this time planning on sleeping. She listened to the footsteps outside her door and opened her eyes hearing the door open again. This time he walked into the room, onto the bed. Rey closed her eyes feeling him cuddle next to her, it made her body radiate with heat feeling him against her.

"I'm gonna miss you peanut." he whispered making her skin rise into tiny bumps. He kissed her cheek and got off the bed, the cold air attacked her as he walked towards the door. His footsteps stopped for a moment then started again then the door closed. He was gone, why'd she let him go? She could've said something to make him stay she wanted him to stay forever. Now it was the end of the night and she'd have to go back to her house that was two hours away. Two hours away from Finn, the man who had proposed to her. The man who had bought a ring as a promise to spend the rest of his life with her, she would spend the rest of her life without.  

* * *

Rey woke up as if the last hours of her night was a dream, but it wasn't. The party actually happened and - she didn't drink either. She was proud of that. But, now she had to go home. She was going to miss it here. Latina music played in the kitchen and the smell of food hitting her nose just like it always did, she was definitely gonna miss that. Getting up she put her original clothes back on, grabbed the dress and walked into the living room. She placed the dress on the couch neatly and waited for Poe to notice her. He was moving his hips to the music while flipping pancakes. Rey listened to the satisfying sizzle it made every time he flipped one. Jessika barged I’m back from a run checking her pulse. She looked at her.

”Hey Rey.” She smiled. Then Poe turned around to see her. He held the skilled up at her as if to ask if she wanted some. She nodded, knowing that this time she wasn’t going to leave unexpectedly. She felt Jessika’s eyes glaring at her.

”..wh-“

”Have you checked your phone?” She asked in monotone. 

“No..why?” 

“You should.” She said before going upstairs. That was odd. Rey checked her phone seeing she had a missed text from Finn. He wanted to know if she wanted to go for a walk in the park. The text was sent too long ago, just ten minutes so she replied back yes. 

“Actually Poe I’m gonna have to cancel on the pancakes.” She informed sticking the phone in her pocket. 

He frowned. “Again?” 

“I’m meeting up with Finn.”

”Oh.” He smirked. “Okay. Have fun.” He said before going back to flipping pancakes. “And Rey, make sure you come back a happily engaged woman.”

”..sure.” She affirmed before making her way out of the house. She got into her car and took a deep breath. It’s been a long week, month and year for her. Let’s hope it’ll things will end on good terms. She started the car and drove to the park, they were just going for a walk she didn’t have to dress fancy right? It was too late to think about that now, she parked a few blocks ahead and walked the rest of the way. Finn was standing by the entrance, he took a deep breath and smiled when he saw her.

”Hi.” She smiled.

”Hey.” He stuck his hands in his pockets leaning on his heels. He was nervous, cutely nervous. Rey wanted to kiss him, so she did. She kissed his cheek. Dammit Rey that’s not what you were aiming for. He grabbed her hand lacing their fingers together.

”Is - this okay? He asked. 

Rey nodded not breaking eye contact once. “Yeah, why wouldn’t it be?”

”Okay.” He chuckled nervously. They walked down the path, cold air blowing in their faces. Rey didn’t seem to mind though, she was too anxious to be cold. She was curious if what Poe said was true. Did he always look at her like that even when she wasn’t paying attention? She checked the corner of her eye to see if he was looking at her, he wasn’t. Then he was, it was a glance that made her heart burst. She could see him fluster and look away. 

“Um - Rey we have to stop.” 

“What why?” 

“I just hold on.” He bent down on one knee and Rey took a deep breath. Was he going to ask again? She was ready she was going to say yes this time. He looked down and began to tie his shoes. Oh. He wasn’t going to, maybe he felt she wasn’t ready. Maybe she needed to prove to him that she was. 

“Are you proposing?” An elderly woman asked approaching them.

”Uh - no - I’m just - tying my shoes.”

”Are you dating?” She asked. Rey looked at this woman in a way as to ask why she was in their business. It wasn’t her business. 

“Uh..” Finn stood up. “Is there something you need miss?” He asked in the nicest way, only Finn could say something rude nicely.

”Yes, I’m looking for my dog and I couldn’t help but notice you two..” she continued to explain as Finn helped got her away from them. He mouthed to Rey that he’ll be back. She sat on a bench and picked a flower from the bush next to her and started the “he loves me, he loves me not” ritual. A lady walked up to her.

”Excuse me miss, this is for you.” She handed her a flower. Not just any flower..a daisy. 

“Thank you.” She smiled. Just as she said that another person handed her one, then another, then another. What was going on here? They were all leading her somewhere and soon enough Rey had a bouquet of flowers in her hands. She ended up at the river. Finn was sitting on a boat waiting for her. She made her way down the steps toward him. He looked up at her.

”I see you got my flowers.” He cheesed standing up to help her get in. 

“I did, yes.” She sat in the boat. “What’s all this?” 

He shrugged. “I thought maybe you’d want to go for a relaxing ride on the most soothing road on the planet.” Rey likes the sound of that. Finn pulled out a baguette.

”Bread?” He offered.

”Sure.” She ripped off a piece and ate it, realizing she was hungry. She took another piece. The soft sound of violins amused her ears, she looked off to the side noticing there was a band playing. She looked at Finn. “Did you plan all of this?” 

“Somewhat.” He shrugged. He began to tow the boat and they drifted down the river. “I just want your last day to be one to remember y’know? Like that lingerie night.” They laughed.

”Finn every second I spend with you is a moment to remember.” She expressed her cheeks full of bread. It was quite dry, it was like Finn read her mind. He began to pour a bottle of what looked liked Champaign in a glass for her.

”It’s apple cider.” He admitted, that made sense. She drank from the glass and looked at him, he looked so happy to be in her presence, with her in this moment. Rey watched his biceps flex as he towed the boat, he was fit as fuck. But he seemed shy or maybe it was her. She placed down the glass.

”Finn, I have a question.”

”Yeah?” He looked at her ready to giver her the world.

“Why are you doing all this? Especially after last night?” 

“I told you..to give you good memories of being here.” It sounded like he was going to say more than what he did. Rey knew that wasn’t all. “Can I ask you something?” 

“Go ahead.” She poured some more cider in her glass. 

“Not to ruin the mood or anything but..why _did_ you date Ben?”

She stopped pouring and looked at him. His face waiting for an answer, a really good answer. “Well,” she put the bottle of cider down preparing herself for what she was going to say. “if you think we always had something going on we didn’t. I was just upset when I saw you with Rose and I wanted to get back at you. Thinking about it now..it was stupid. Ben was such a dick.”

”Well it worked, you definitely got back at me, because I was pissed when I saw you two together. I seriously couldn’t believe my eyes, like it didn’t make sense.”

”That’s what I thought with you and Rose!” She psyched.

“That’s what everyone thought!” He chuckled. “Even at Poe’s dinner I could tell everyone was questioning why things ended up like that.” They both sighed. “What a year.” 

“I’m glad it’s almost over.” Rey started. “I’m ready to forget everything that happened.”

”Wait hold on everything? Even me?” Rey inhaled as she moved back slightly, questioning the stupidity in that question. “Come on, you have to admit we had some good times this year.”

“The ‘good times’ are what led to the bad times.” She explained. “But..yeah those times _were_ good.”

“Yeah like when we went ice skating - actually that wasn’t very fun for me.”

“It was for me!” Rey laughed.

”It _was_ funny when you had ice on you butt.” They giggled reminiscing in the moment. Wishing their old times like this. In the back of her mind she kept reminding herself that st the end of the day she still had a home to back to. She couldn’t stay forever - at least, she couldn’t afford to. She noticed Finn was thinking the same thing because his smile went away. He parked the boat and stepped out of it holding his hand out to her. She took it letting him lift her out.

”Now what..would make Rey’s day even more special than it is?”

”Fi-“

”Follow me.” He climbed the cobblestone stairs, Rey behind him. She really didn’t want him to waste anymore money on her, the day was good enough already. It didn’t take much to make her happy. At the top of the stairs, on the grassy platform, there was a tree with lights all around it and under the tree was a candlelit table for two. “Shall we?”

“Finn..” Rey stood there shooketh. Why was he doing all of this? Maybe he did have game after all, was this all just to prove his point? Finn would do something like that. No he wouldn’t, what was she talking about. Before Rey knew it she was sitting across from Finn at the table looking at the menu. The band of violins playing next to them, it truly was romantic. There wasn’t many food options, only baguette. Finn was so cheap at the necessary things. She felt something on her head and noticed a bunch of woman placing a flower crown around her and Finn’s head.

”Where did you find these people?” She asked.

”I work with them.”

That made sense. Anyone would do a favor for Finn. Rey would do _all_ the favors. She would do one right now if he asked, probably drown herself getting him a glass of water because she wasn’t that well at listening but y’know. Her phone vibrated, it was a text from Jessika asking how everything was going. Finn was talking to his co-worker, so she replied saying all was well. Being honest Rey wasn’t sure what else he’d have planned for this date - it was a date right?

”Finn this is a date right?” She asked, aloud this time. He looked at her, raising an eyebrow.

”Do you want it to be a date?”

She wasn’t sure if she should emit to his vibe. She did have feelings for him just like he did her, but she was afraid to admit that. Why?

”I don’t know do _you_?” She fed into it.

”Why Rey this has been a date since I grabbed your hand, which also tells me you think it’s one too.”

She scoffed as her cheeks grew pink.

”Why won’t you admit it to me?” 

“Why should I have to? You know.” She rested the napkin on her thighs.

”And _you_ know that knowing is different than hearing it aloud.” He had a point. “Look you don’t have to tell me, but I’ll just be here thinking the opposite of how you feel.” He sighed trying to seem sad. The food arrived - or bread. It was served with butter and jam to spice it up. 

“Rey.”

She looked at him as she smeared jam into her baguette.

”Thank you for coming. I mean, you could’ve just ditched me and went home..maybe raise a family with some guy and forget about me. But you didn’t, so thank you.”

”Finn you changed my life, and no matter how mad I get at you, I’ll never just leave you. You helped shape me into the woman I became and I thank you for that.” She stuffed the baguette in her mouth, to hungry to break it into pieces. As usual Finn didn’t mind, he just continued to butter his bread as Rey savagely devoured hers. That’s why she loved him and..now she was just gonna hurt him again by leaving and she pushed him away again  just like she did him all the time. She only did it to him, no one else. She was so mean to him at times and for what? Rey started to feel bad for the mistreatment, even earlier today she was just so ungrateful of the time she was spending with him because she was overwhelmed. What was wrong with her, why was she like this?

”Rey are you okay?” Finn asked and she realized that she was weeping aloud with a baguette in her mouth. There he goes, checking on her like he always did because he was a good man.

”I love you so much Finn!” She wailed. “So much...I love you so so much.” He stared at her taking that in. She was saying it with emotion from her heart not just her brain this time. She got up to run away and hide, hide from these feelings and emotions. But Finn grabbed her arm and pulled her into his. His hug made all her worries go away. This is what she needed - not the hug Finn. She rubbed around his back warming her hands with his buff. The violins grew louder and the lights became bright. They were surrounded by people who were all humming the same tune of the old song Daisy Bell from 1892. A song at which they were born a hundred years later. Maybe Finn went a little too far with the daisies, she didn’t like them _that_ much. 

He sucked his teeth looking at the ground. “My shoes are untied again.” He bent down on one knee to tie them and pulled out a ring. “This year may have been our worst. But it just proves how much we need each other. I can’t afford a carriage.” He smiled referring to the song. “Will you take my hand in marriage?” 

“You’re asking again? Even after I said no?”

”I can’t give up on a girl like you.” He complimented. Rey took a deep breath, this was it, no matter how much her alternate personality made her want to run she stayed. This man was who she wanted to be with, this man is who she loved no one else. She couldn’t let him go for someone else to take, he was hers and she was his.

”I thou-“

”Just say yes.” an elderly woman said from the crowd. Rey looked deeply into Finns eyes, they were glowing of hope and she wanted to keep them that way. 

She nodded her head. “..yes.”

”Yes?”

”Yes!” She chortled before kissing him. A kiss she felt like she had been waiting her whole life to plant on him. The violins made the moment even better with their swift music. Everyone applauded them and then left, that’s all they were there for apparently. Rey didn’t care though, she was happy not even happy, she was in love. She got this amazing feeling in her stomach and she wasn’t sure if it was excitement or not. Finally, they released to look at each other. They giggled and kissed again. Not noticing their surroundings, forgetting the time, just being there. Rey released.

”Finn, Finn.” she swallowed not taking her hands away from his chest.

”What?” He asked, holding her in his arms.

”What about my house?”

”Move out.”

”I just moved in!”

”What’s more important?”

Rey kisses him back as an answer, moving her hands towards his soft face. She loved that man and couldn’t wait to go home with him and stay with him, for real this time.

They arrived at Poe’s house and knocked on his door giving each other romantic glances and giggling while waiting for someone to answer. Poe answered and looked at both of them. Their arms together locking their hands, Rey's head rested on Finn's shoulder. Both beaming with glee. Poe smiled and opened the door wider. He looked at Rey.

”Good job.” He patted her back. “Congratulations you two.”

Jessika ran into the room. “It was so romantic!” She hugged them both.

”What do you mean?” Finn asked.

”Maz sent us a recording of the proposal.”

”Maz was there!?” That's who the elder in the crowd was. Of course it was Maz.

”So, what’re you guys gonna do now?”

They looked at each other with the same idea in their heads.

”Well you know about the proposal so I guess that’s all you needed to hear.” Finn stated.

”I agree with Finn.” Rey began. “We should probably go and - plan our wedding.”

”Yes and - start our vows. You guys should too since your going to be our best man and woman.” Jessika and Poe gasped at each other in excitement beginning to jump up and down squealing like pigs giving Finn and Rey time to leave without being noticed. They hopped in Finn’s car.

”Easy escape.” Finn smiled. “Come on, let’s go on our ‘honeymoon before honeymoon honeymoon.’”

”I like the sound of that.” She smirked grabbing his hand. She gave him a sweet soft peck on his lips. _What a man_ , she thought along with a bunch of other things you wouldn’t think someone like her would know about. They held each other’s hand all the way up to Finn’s bedroom, the room Rey missed most of all. They giggled like children closing the door behind them. He always kept the room just the right temperature so that when they heated it up with their - chemistry. It wouldn’t be too hot, or too cold. Ugh he was just so amazing and prepared for life. They could finally fool around without worrying about regretting it the next day. They had nothing to wake up to other than each other, which was all they could ever wanted to wake up to. They couldn't fool around too much though, their bodies were filled with a lot of bread, they spent half of the day complaining about how bad their stomachs hurt. Rey couldn’t help but get excited for the next chapter of their lives. It was definitely going to be good. 


End file.
